'Ori Aere

i'm back

2011-04-15T20:38:00.000-07:00

it has been over 5 months since i last blogged

miss me?

yeah i didn't think so :P

i failed at nablopomo

attempting to blog everyday isn't for me

you're welcome

i started back to school in january

finally getting back to work

so happy to be off of unemployment

it was hard

and embarrassing

i felt judged

it's easy to judge when you're not in someone else's shoes

i learned a lot from the experience

it has made me strive to be better

there's always good

the timing of everything has been amazing

i feel extremely blessed

and old

i turned 27 in March

juggling everything when i was younger was easier
or so it seems

i decided on a major

i am excited about it

sort of

i have mixed feelings about school

it's complicated

maybe someday i'll write about it

i had my transfer school all picked out

i am rethinking that now

i like Nor Cal

So Cal might be a nice change though

there is work for me down there too

honestly though, i often think about leaving Cali

i don't feel i can right now {sigh}

bright side:

i went to the ocean for a couple days over spring break

it's less than 3 hours away

first visit in well over 10 years

i am embarrassed to admit that

and annoyed it's true

i loved it

my toes are craving the warm sand

i'm planning another visit soon

nice to know wherever I got for school there will be beaches

well, most likely

i'm a lucky girl

a busy one too
better get back to work

more soon

well, most likely
no promises

figuring things out

2010-11-06T23:28:00.000-07:00

that's what i'm doing right now.

figuring things out.

figuring out where i am going.

how i am getting there.

what i want to change.

how i want to change.

who i want to be.

career

education

goals

hobbies

blogging

relationships

lifestyle

faith

so many things on my mind.

i'm feeling like this time in my life is very important. that the decisions I make now and in the coming months will have a significant impact on the years to come.

that decisions i make now will shape me in so many ways. help me. make me stronger. happier. healthier. more confident (i so need that! especially after this weekend and my anxiety attack)

become a better person.

a better me.

i'm feeling optimistic about the future.

i still have days where i worry. where i feel scared and stressed because of the uncertainty.

those clouds always pass though.

and then the future looks bright again.

it is bright.

tired and grumpy

2010-11-05T23:42:00.000-07:00

the title of this post sums up how I'm feeling right now. and how many people I encountered today were feeling.

i really don't feel like doing anything, but curling up on the couch and watching a show.

i have a few things I still need to do before that can happen though.

cleaning my kitchen will not be one of those things.

it's a disaster.

i spent most of the day yesterday re-organizing and getting rid of a bunch of stuff. most of that was out of sight stuff, but my kitchen wasn't in bad shape by the time I had to call it quits.

after baking last night and making caramel corn tonight and the fact that I'm still in the middle of eating my dinner (yes it's after 11:30) it looks like a my pantry and fridge exploded.

i have to babysit tomorrow. then pick up my stuff from the craft faire (i'm hoping that I don't end up having an anxiety attack like I did tonight)

so cleaning won't even be an option until tomorrow evening/night, if I even have the energy at that point.

okay that's enough whining/complaining.

my eyes are getting heavier by the minute.

one of these days I'll have a "real" post.

i'm just not ready to give up on NaBloPoMo just yet.

i know...this is a pathetic excuse for a post. it does count thought right?

baking, fairs, and babysitting

2010-11-04T20:21:00.000-07:00

Once again I find myself typing out a quick, {boring} post for the day.

I am in the midst of busy evening/night.

I have my 5th batch of chocolate crackles in the oven.

I am participating in a craft fair on Saturday selling various styles of these:

Each vendor is required to bring: 5 dozen cookies (insane in my opinion!) and 1 handmade craft item of baked good for a raffle basket (my business partner is taking care of that)

All our products have to have hanging tags on them with our company name and price. (The tags won't be

dropped off to me until after 10pm)

I'm babysitting all day tomorrow so I won't have much time to get things done. By the time I'm done with that I will have to go straight to set up for the event.

{I probably should have spent my day preparing for the event rather than going on an organizing and cleaning frenzy.}

I'm looking forward to babysitting tomorrow. I haven't seen the kids since last Friday. I have especially missed the baby. She is the sweetest, most easy going, adorable baby. She has a head full of thick dark hair. Like I said adorable!

What I have not missed is hearing "Want to play trains" repeatedly from the 4 year old. He's a cutie too though. I just don't play trains very well. {grin}

I'm babysitting for a few hours on Saturday too. Luckily I don't have to be present at the craft fair. They handle all the sales. {I'm actually not thrilled about this.} We have to provide an inventory list prior to the event {still needs to be done} so that makes me feel a little better. Even if they didn't require one I would still do one.

Sunday the cable company is sending a repair man to my house. Apparently I have a cable signal leak and it can effect marine and aeronautical radios and such so it has to be repaired right away. I'm worried about how it may be effecting me and am wondering if that could be the reason I've had exceptionally crappy cell service lately {I do not like you AT&T}. Maybe it's just that it's an iPhone4 and the reception is crap. My grandpa is bugging me to get a case for it to see if that helps. {he's buying. woohoo!}

My final batch of cookies are done.

Gotta go! :)

{cat} paparazzi

2010-11-03T23:46:00.000-07:00

I have a problem.

If you asked my cat, she'd tell you.
{Well, she would if she talked...to strangers}

I'm like the paparazzi.

{a very small sampling}

If she isn't ignoring me, she is usually running from me.

Sometimes I'm pretty sure she is rolling her eyes.

I can only imagine how many pictures I'll take when {if} I have children!

I worry for them.

loving fall!

2010-11-02T23:44:00.000-07:00

That's right I am finally embracing and loving fall!

Just a couple months ago I was complaining about how I was not ready for summer to end {we actually had a few 100 degree days in September!}

However, things have changed and I am now officially loving the fall weather. {Sunny 80 degree days can be considered fall right? ha!}

here are a few reason i love fall

beautiful colors in nature

getting away with not washing my car

baking without baking/roasting {it's cool enough to use my oven!}

thanksgiving {read: lots of food}

caramel apples

heated seats

working out {so much more pleasant when it's not 100+ degrees outside}

new {to me} fall clothes

sweats and other comfy clothes

caramel corn {making not partaking}

hats

boots

trying to hit all the puddles while driving down my grandpa's dirt road

little to no yard work!

soup

hot chocolate

crisp, clean air

fall back {an extra hour of sleep, ha!}

via

lots of reason to love fall!

What do you love about the weather where you are?

2 down 28 to go. (barely squeezed this in before midnight. whew!)

NaBloPoMo

2010-11-01T22:59:00.000-07:00

So I've decided to jump on the bandwagon and participate in NaBloPoMo.

Seeing as how I barely manage to compose one post a month (and let's be honest that one post is nothing to get excited about) the fact that I am going to try to post every day for a month should be...interesting to say the least.

Maybe it'll help me decide once and for all if this blogging thing is for me.

I've had a few posts bouncing around in my head. That is almost always the case though. It's the getting them out of my head and typed out, into words that make sense, that I struggle with.

I like a challenge though.

Speaking a challenges, I went to the gym tonight. It's pretty bad when you walk in and the guy who works there says "Where have you been!?" It was definitely embarrassing, but the more I think about it maybe I should be flattered? Anyway, I digress, I challenged myself to run a mile without stopping tonight.

Now I realize that doesn't seem like much at all and for most people it would be/is a piece of cake, but for me...not so much.

I seriously haven't ran a mile without stopping since high school, sophomore year in high school actually (the final year I was required to take P.E.) and even then I hated every second of it.

I was doing pretty well until about the final 1/4 mile and then something started rubbing or poking me in the foot, not quite sure which. I guess running without having really even having walked in a new (to me) pair of shoes may not have been the best idea. I did my best to ignore it and kept running though it and I can proudly say I finished!

I can't say it felt all that great though. I ended up with a blister on my foot (I can't pinpoint if I fixed the problem or not because of the blister's presence now) and as soon I finished the mile I was useless. I seriously thought I was going to be sick. I went upstairs to lift some weights, but I pretty much just sat on one of the machines sipping my water. I was pretty bummed because I really enjoy lifting weights and was looking forward to. When I finally decided to stand up and attempt to do something I only felt worse, so I just drove my self home. Pathetic!

I did meet my challenge though and like I said I am proud of myself for that! Now that the nausea is starting to wear off I'm even beginning to feel pretty darn good about it.

Now let's see if I can complete the NaBloPoMo challenge.

I'm hoping it's painless (for me as the writer and for any readers)!

1 down 29 more to go!

i can't be trusted.

2010-09-03T23:38:00.000-07:00

Lately I've been all about saving money. Partially out of neccessity and partially out of a desire to live a simpler life.

I've been couponing, menu planning, and just buying less in general.

The other day at the grocery store I was walking down the soda aisle and my favorite soda caught my eye. Ruby Red Squirt.

I almost never buy soda at the grocery store.

I actually drink very little soda. I cut back a couple years ago. I got sick of the the ridiculous prices at restaurants (even though grandpa is the one usually paying and encourages me to order one) and the fact is they are awfully unhealthy.

I do however splurge and give into my craving once, maybe twice a week. When I do I usually stop at a nearby mini mart and snag one.

The problem with that is what I end up paying for one bottle I could almost get a 12 pack of soda.

So keeping this in mind while at the grocery store and being all about saving money right now I decide to just buy a 12 pack of the Ruby Red Squirt.

I figured it was a smart move on my part.

I couldn't have been more wrong.

That 12 pack was gone in less than a week.

Now I didn't down every soda in the pack within the week.

I was wasteful. So very wasteful.

I always say that the thing I like about soda is the carbonation. The burn when you take that first drink. Then I tried sparkling water (blech) and realized that the syrup/sweet of the soda was part of the equation.

So a couple (sometimes a few) times a day I would pop open a soda and take one big drink and then leave it sitting on the counter to go flat. Occasionally I would finish one, but not usually.

See wasteful. Horribly wasteful.

I did this every day until the soda was gone.

I was irritated at the rate that I was consuming them, but I just told myself that once they were gone that was it. No more buying soda at the grocery store.

I considered savoring them, but in the end I just gave in and indulged in one whenever I wanted and they quickly disappeared.

Once they were gone it was a mix of relief and disappointment.

Disappointed because I liked them. Relieved because I felt gross drinking soda so often.

In the end I probably broke even money-wise, maybe saved a tiny bit.

However any savings wasn't worth how I felt about drinking so much soda.

I've decided I just can't be trusted with soda in the house.

Better yet I need to break the soda habit completely, once and for all.

not ready

2010-08-26T00:34:00.000-07:00

For the last couple weeks I've been struggling with the fact that summer's quickly coming to an end. Usually I'm happy and ready to embrace fall. This year, not so much.

I'm so not ready for fall.

I'm not ready to start wearing shoes and socks. (oh how I hate them!)

I'm not ready to stop wearing tank tops.

I'm not ready for my tan to fade.

I'm not ready to unpack my pathetic cool weather wardrobe (shockingly I'm not ridiculously sick of my warm weather clothes yet!)

I'm not ready to think about investing in jeans/pants that actually fit me. I'm perfectly happy with my capris, skirts, dresses, and shorts that I've been getting by with.

I'm not ready for my tomatoes plants to stop producing and die.

I'm not ready to deal with a grumpy cat who won't go outside because of rain.

I'm not ready to have the rain soak the bottoms of my jeans and make my hair a frizzy mess.

I'm not ready to give up my nights with my back door open and the cool summer breeze cooling my house.

The list goes on and on.

The funny thing is while I'm so not ready for summer to end, I haven't really done any fun "summery" things that are worth mentioning. Maybe that's part of it though. I love the idea of fun summers, camping, barbecues, pool parties, boating on the lake, etc. and while those things may not end up on my calendar in the summer there's always a chance they could. There's no possibility of those things in the fall/winter. At all.

Another reason I am so in love with summer this year is because it has been a lot milder then usual. The number of days that I have felt like I was going to ~~die~~ melt have been few.

Mother nature is a funny lady though. I think she has recognized my struggle with coming season change and is trying to make the transition easier on me. The last three days have been 105+. Sunday it isn't even suppose to get up to 80. See how she is?

I'm not falling for it though.

I still don't want summer to end.

I want fall to stay away.

I admit there are a few, okay many, things about fall that I love. Right now though all I can think about is how I'm not ready for summer to end.

I'll report back soon with a list of reasons why I love fall/winter.

In the meantime I will be enjoying and embracing the final weeks of summer and wishing it wasn't coming to an end.

I'm so not ready.

yet again

2010-08-12T23:17:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting at my desk with a bunch of papers scattered in front of me.

Papers I've been through dozens of times. Reviewing, comparing, selecting, researching, and so on.

Yet again I find myself considering going back to school.

I have been enrolled in classes two (or is it three?) times now in the past year. Each time I drop classes right before school starts.

I get overwhelmed. Overwhelmed at the cost, the time, the commitment of it all.

Plus, if I'm being honest: I hate school. I hate classrooms, book learning, structure, sitting, etc. I dislike it all so very much.

I couldn't get out of high school fast enough. And while I know it'll be different then high school, it's still school.

The thing is, I want to teach. I want to be a teacher.

To be a teacher though you have to go to school and do well and finish. So they tell me. A minor detail. {Ha!}

That's the only reason I would go back though.

A degree doesn't mean a whole lot to me. Maybe it should. But it doesn't. I just want to be a teacher.

Or at least I think I do.

I mean, I just mentioned how much I hate, structure and such.

Though I imagine it's a little different when it's children and you are the one teaching and instructing.

I've always wanted to be a teacher.

At about 3 years old, I would sit in my little chair and read books to my stuffed animals. I would hold the book with one hand, woven between my fingers, so my furry friends could see the pictures. {My mom was amazed how I was able to hold the book in such a way and had no clue where I learned it.}

As I got older I loved playing school with my little brother. He was a crappy student though. {I'm sure it nothing to do with the fact I was a bossy teacher who gave a lot of homework.}

I often wonder if homeschooling my {future} kids would satisfy my urge to teach.

I don't know.

Maybe I don't have a realistic idea of view of what teaching will be like. Maybe I'll end up hating it.

How will I ever know though if I don't try it?

On the other hand...Do I want to put the time and money into it when I have serious concerns that I could hate it?

Am I just over thinking it?

I've worked in classrooms and schools. I've always really enjoyed it.

I wouldn't be lying if I said I LOVE the idea of having summers off as well.

Still here I sit, not sure what to do. Wondering if I will once again, in just a couple weeks, I'll be dropping the classes that I'm spending so much time {trying} to select and enroll in.

Wondering how do able it all is. {There aren't a ton of night and online classes to choose from.} How much will I really want it a semester or two in.

I would {will} without a doubt be working {full-time} while going to school. If things go as planned {which I expect them to, how's that for optimistic! Ha!} I will be working for a great company, owned by equally great people {working for friends is the best!}. I don't see myself quitting a job that I love, that I'm dedicated to, that I enjoy.

Will I then be wasting my time, killing myself for nothing trying to go to school as well?

Will I find myself {yet again} quitting school to focus on my career?

It's possible.

Then I will really feel like I've wasted my time and money if I don't finish.

So many things to think about, consider.

Not much time to figure it all out.

Though there is always next semester....

{end rambling}

late night productivity

2010-08-09T00:22:00.000-07:00

For some reason I always get motivated to be productive late at night.

The projects and tasks I seem to put off day after day become something I want to tackle.

It drives me crazy really.

If I act upon my motivation and be productive it makes for a late night. How can you ignore the call to productivity though?

It's a frustrating circle.

Late nights usually equal late starts to the day. Which leads to me feeling pathetic and frustrated with myself.

Late morning only contribute further to late nights.

See what I mean?

{Yeah, I know, I could always force my self to get out of bed. I'm told it's within my control.

It's just well...it's not pretty.

I'm just looking out for others. Trust me.}

Here I am though in the midst of one of my productive late nights.

My office is my project at the moment.

I've done some dusting, sorting, and organizing.

For the last 30 minutes though I've been on a quest to find pushpins.

I know they're somewhere. I've checked the small draw in which they use to be stored about 4 times now. They still haven't made an appearance.

I ~~hung up~~ propped up a bulletin board. It's going to serve as my reminder/inspiration board. Until it falls over {again}. Then it'll be an object of irritation.

We'll see how that goes.

It would sure do a lot more inspiring and look a lot better if I could find pushpins though. {And if my cat doesn't try to eat them once I do.}

I made tomato jam today. It didn't turn out too bad for my first batch! I think I can improve upon it though. It's still sitting on the stove. I need to put it away.

Tomorrow will be 8 years since my grandma passed away. I miss that lady. I hate breast cancer.

My brother won back the title of favorite child this weekend. He purchased two tickets to a Meatloaf concert. One for him and one for mom.

I don't see myself topping that in the near future.

At least I still hold the title of favorite grandchild.

Speaking of which. I have an appointment tomorrow for a much needed haircut. Courtesy of grandpa. He spoils me.

It's been close to six months since I've had a trim. My split ends have splits. I'm looking forward to it.

I'm starting to get tired.

I've been sitting in front of my computer for far too long now.

The jam's still on the stove.

And I still can't find the pushpins.

That burst of productivity didn't last long.

Dang computer gets me every time.

it's all good!

2010-08-03T22:39:00.000-07:00

So yeah, I'm a bad blogger.

I tend to spout off and post when I'm mad, sad, worried, etc. and then when things are looking up and looking good I abandon this space.

See how I am??

Sorry about that!

My dad had another test/procedure last week. It actually eased my worries a tad. They found some swelling and infection. Why did that make me feel better? Well because it seemed likely that the infection could very well have been what was making him fee so tired, sick, weak, etc. He started an antibiotic and within a couple of days he was already feeling better. He then got his CT Scan results and it was confirmed no cancer!

They have identified his problems and are treating them.

He will need surgery at some point, but since they are addressing some things he should be able to hold off on that.

I am so relieved to say the least.

I really appreciate the many good thoughts, prayers, and sweet words over the last few weeks. It has meant a lot.

I am sure it's really obvious without me saying it...I'm a big worrier. I can deal with what comes my way when it involves me, but when it comes to my family it kills me when I can't protect them. I don't like not being in control. It scares me and I don't like being scared.

I'm not scared anymore though!

I am really feeling like things are looking up. In many ways.

The way I have been feeling the last week is a little surprising.

I tend to be a bit a moody person and not always the most optimistic either.

The last week though...I have been feeling really positive, happy, and hopeful. Even cheerful!

Don't get me wrong I'm not a big downer all the time I'm just not always so....hhmmmm...I don't know. I'm just me!! (:

Here's an example: Last Friday I got stuck on hold for an 1 hour and 45 minutes....by the time I got done with the call I had been on the phone for just over 2 hours...that's not counting the 40 minutes I was on hold on prior to that when my phone (I hate you AT&T!) cut out on me on while taking grandpa (who's doing well!!) to the post office. Even that didn't ruin my great mood! I joked to my dad that I might as well use up the minutes I have left and some 300+ rollover minutes that were about to expire on my account in a day or two.

The fact it didn't ruin my mood though could have had something to do with the fact that I got to hang out with three of my absolute favorite kids!! I love them to pieces and had an awesome time with them!!

I have mentioned in past posts that a couple friends of mine started a business last year and when the time comes and they are ready to start hiring I have a for sure, guaranteed job, well paying job....Well, things are really starting to happen and take off with their new business! Big things!! I am really getting excited. (I would so love to talk all about the industry that they are in and the products, but I don't feel comfortable having that information out on the internet at this time. A business acquaintance already learned that the hard way. Ha! Dang google! Maybe in the future I'll blog about it a little.)

It could be a matter of weeks or maybe even a few months still, it's still hard to say. I have a feeling it's not too far off though. I'm hopeful. And did I mentioned excited?!? Well I am, especially after a text I got tonight!

(I have been and will continue to look for work until that happens though! I have to and need to!)

So in summary:

Dad's good.

Grandpa's good.

I'm good.

Things are looking good.

Life is good.

It's all good.

no answers

2010-07-22T23:45:00.000-07:00

My dad was due to get his test result today.

To say I was a ball of nerves all day would be an understatement.

Shaky, uneasy, worried, stressed, no appetite, you name it.

I ran out to a do a couple quick errands this afternoon for distraction. I happened to pass him on the road on his way to his appointment. On my way home I saw him waiting in his truck outside the surgeon's office. He was early. Seeing him there waiting hit me kind of hard.

I went home and sat down and fold laundry and turned on the t.v. Oprah was on. I don't like Oprah. It provided a little distraction though.

I happened to check my phone and notice I had missed a call from my dad.

AT&T sucks.

My heart started racing as I called him back.

He answers. I brace myself for the results.

What I got though, what he got, NOTHING!

Apparently the doctor's office was closed. There was a note on the door saying they were closed for the weekend and that the doctors was at the hospital.

He calls the answering service. Gets the same story.

Now, I get it. The doctor is a surgeon. Emergencies happen, that's understandable, however, I highly doubt that his receptionist had to report to the hospital for surgery or whatever it was as well. Wouldn't you think they would call and notify patients?? Yeah, well they didn't. They didn't bother calling his home phone or his cell phone.

Now they are closed for the weekend and we have no answers.

I was not happy to say the least.

I called the answering service myself to try to find out what exactly was going on. All they could tell me was that the office was closed at noon and they weren't sure if it was for an emergency or not. They offered to take a message and give it to the doctor when he checked in. Whatever time that may be. I went ahead and gave them the details to do so.

My guess is we won't know anything until next week sometime.

I did have a very nice dinner with my parents {it's so weird to say "my parents"!} tonight. {Thai food, yum!} It actually relaxed me quite a bit which is surprising and nice!

My dad is crashing on my mom's couch tonight so he doesn't have to get up at 4am to go to work {it's a 40 minute drive from his house}. I'm glad they're friends. It's good for both of them.

I came home did a little yoga and am now heading to bed to read for a while. It's not often I make it to bed before 12, look at me!

Grandpa has an early doctors appointment in the morning.

I'm ready for the weekend! Salt opens in theaters tomorrow. I've been looking forward to seeing it. I may just have to treat myself to movie!

yoga, twitching, appointments & other random things

2010-07-21T23:48:00.000-07:00

It's Wednesday! The peak of the week as I like to say! Or hump day as many refer to it.

I've started doing yoga again. I'm loving it. My muscle have been sore the last few days and that makes me happy. There is nothing like achy, burning muscles from a good workout. That confirmation that your workout/practice was beneficial. That your body is strong and getting stronger. The awareness. It's a great feeling. I'm going to use the gift cards I earned using SwagBucks and order a new dvd or two soon.

My left eye has been twitching since Sunday. I have no idea why. The last couple of days the twitches haven't been as strong or as frequent as they were the first couple of days, but my eye is feeling a little numb almost. The Chinese say it's a bad omen. The Indians say it's good. How's that for confusing? I think I will just stick with it's a muscle spasm. Though I would like to think it's a good omen.

Between my dad and grandpa this week there are 5 doctors appointments. 3 of those 5 have already taken place. One being a CT Scan to check to see if my dad has bladder or prostate cancer. He gets the results tomorrow afternoon. The anxiety and worry comes and goes, but for the most part I am remaining positive.

I am starting to get quite a few tomatoes out of my garden. I am going to have to start doling them out to visitors and family members. I'm really wishing I would have planted the basil seeds that I bought. I go through so much of it this time of year. I pretty much live off of Tomato & Basil Bruschetta.

Speaking of bruschetta. I had lunch with my grandpa today. We went to a local Italian restaurant. I ordered the heirloom tomato bruschetta that they offer as a special every July. I was pretty disappointed with the taste. Watery and bland. I make better. The bigger issue though was the name of the dish. It's a peeve of mine and it drives me crazy every summer when I see it on their menu. They have the dish listed as Organic Heirloom Bruschetta Toastettes. Now here's the problem. Bruschetta is Italian for toasted or charred bread. So when the restaurant says: Bruschetta Toastettes they are being redundant. On top of that, if you really want to get picky it reads like the bread is Organic and Heirloom. Uhm, yeah, I don't think that's possible (the heirloom part that is). The name of the dish should be: Organic Heirloom Tomato Bruschetta. I mean they are an Italian restaurant, they should know Italian cuisine. Bruschetta with various toppings is a very popular Italian dish. I used my rewards card today at lunch. I'm kind of hoping I get a survey via email like I usually do. I may have to say something. It drives me that batty!

Speaking of lunch with grandpa. He salted his hamburger today. That was a new one.

I got to stop in a one of my favorite thrift stores the other day. It was a rare treat. It's about 45 minutes away from home. I happened to be nearby for an appointment. I found an awesome pair of shoes. Just the style I've been looking for for a while now. Two pairs of capris. as well Much needed. I've lost a decent amount of weight the last few months and don't have much that fits me. I ditched my smaller clothes a few years ago. Now I'm paying for it. Literally. I also found an awesome skirt at Goodwill tonight. Long and flowy. Just what I've been wanting for a while.

My clothes line is finally fixed. I'm actually really excited. I love clothes that have been dried out in the sun. They some so fresh and clean. It's cheaper too. Though I do fluff my towels in the dryer after bringing them in from outside. No one like drying off with a piece of sand paper.

Oh! Sandpaper!! That reminds me of a project I need to work on! Maybe this weekend. If it goes well I'll post pics. I hope it goes well. I'm not the most crafty/handy person. I'll give it my best shot though.

The last couple of nights have cooled off quite nicely. It has been scorching hot here the past week. It was nice to have a small break. My poor air conditioner had seriously been running for 4 days straight. And it was still a good 80 degrees in my house. Even hotter in some rooms. Unfortunately the cooler weather isn't going to last. Tomorrow is suppose to be 99 and Friday on back over 100.

It's getting late. I need to go do yoga. What I really want is a snack though.

Maybe I'll reward myself after I do yoga.

I think that's a good plan.

{grin}

i'll never know

2010-07-20T23:29:00.000-07:00

A couple of years ago I received a phone call from a neighbor of some good friends of mine. She had heard that I did some catering and cooking for them and was interested in me cooking for her family.

They lived in a upper middle class neighborhood in a beautiful house with amazing decor. They had made quite a bit of money during the large housing boom and they were enjoying it! I was in awe. The family was wonderful, some of the nicest people I've ever met! They lived a hectic life though and were always on the go, taking vacations, and traveling all around. Often times they were too busy to even eat the food I prepared, but they still had me make it anyways.

I cooked meals for them for about a year when things started to change.

I knew the husband's business was struggling (along with everyone else in the same industry). There was an obvious stress in the house. On top of financial and professional worries the husband was bipolar and from what I have been told battled an addiction as well, which added additional stress to his wife and family.

As the months rolled on the stress only began to build further. The husband's business ended up going bankrupt. One day I dropped off some meals when no one was home and left an invoice as usual. A few days later I was texting back and forth with the woman I worked for and she said she would leave payment for me at the house and that she would be in touch about meals for the following week.

I went by and picked up payment, but never heard from her again.

I wasn't surprised. I was a little disappointed, because I really like their family, but I didn't want to put her in a weird position so I never have gotten in touch with her.

As the months rolled on I learned from my friends that they moved out of their house and that the husband and wife were separated. They were going through a really difficult time.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago, I was stopped at a stop sign down the road from my house and a man on a bike caught my eye. I watched him as he rode his bike across the cross walk in front of my car. He looked familiar to me. He looked like the man who's family I cooked meals for, but I wasn't sure. After he passed in front of my car he quickly looked back over his shoulder and looked me right in the eye. Like he knew me. At that point I pretty sure it was him, but I still was questioning myself a little.

A few days later I was visiting with my dad on the phone and asked him about the man. They worked in the same industry and knew each other professionally. I asked if he knew how/what he was doing. He told me that he was still around and that some of his (my dad's) coworkers saw him recently. Apparently they use to work for the man and owes them some money and he let them know that he was working on getting them the money he owed them. I mentioned how I thought I had saw him riding a bike a few days prior, but wasn't sure it was him.

A couple days later I get a call from my dad telling me he had heard from his co-workers that morning that the man (I cooked for) had committed suicide. I was shocked. We had just been talking about him.

It was a few days before there was an article in the paper about a body found in the river. I knew right away who it was even though they didn't release a name. About a week later and they finally positively identified his body and released his name. Even though I already knew it was him, it was hard to read his name in print. The newspaper never confirmed if it was an accident or suicide, but did mention foul play had been rule out.

Since finding out about his death, his family has been on my mind a lot, especially his children.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about the man I saw on the bike, wondering if it was him I saw that day.

A couple days later I get my answer.

I was reading the online guest book tied to his obituary.

As I was scanning some of the entries one in particular caught my eye. It was from his mom, one of many messages she had written to him.

One of the things it said was that she knows he is reading the messages and that if he can, will he please direct her to where his bike is.

Reading that hit me like a ton of bricks.

When I think back to when I saw him it had to of been within a day or two, possibly even the same day, he was reported missing.

I've been think a lot about what was going through his mind. He obliviously recognized me. Was he embarrassed to be riding a bike and seeing someone who use to cook his meals? Did he think I was judging him?

There's no way to know.

It bothers me that I didn't smile or wave. Though it wasn't intentional it still bothers me. I often don't react quick enough when I'm unsure or caught off guard

The area of town he was in was near the levee. That was the direction he was riding. Not far from the river.

I can't help, but wonder if that was the day he died. If I was one of the last people to see him alive.

I guess I'll never know.

Today his family said good-bye to him and he was laid to rest.

I hope they find peace.

And I hope he has found it.

when it rains it pours

2010-07-12T23:05:00.000-07:00

I'm so overwhelmed right now.

I've done so well not letting things get to me the past week or so.

Tonight it's all hitting.

Mainly because I hate to see people I care about struggle.

My dad has had some health problems off and on for a while now.

He's recently developed some new ones and they are slowly getting worse.

The doctors aren't sure what exactly is wrong. They are going to review everything and then decide if they want to send him to a surgeon or a specialist.

The thing is my dad doesn't deal with things well.

At all.

Since his divorce he has REALLY struggled. He's suffered from anxiety, depression, insomnia, and more.

He has been doing so well the last few weeks. I've been so very proud of him. He's been trying so hard.

Then WHAM!! Things just hit.

His health has taken a turn for the worse. Finances are tight. Works stressful. And then tonight his wallet and keys are stolen out of his truck.

He ran into a little store real quick to get something left his truck running (obviously not a smart move). After getting back in the truck he realized his wallet was gone. Later he then realized a set of keys were gone as well.

Not only does someone have his wallet, cards, and money. They have his drivers license with his home address (which is out in the middle of no where practically) and the keys to a car that his home while he is at work all day.

I am sick over it. Mainly because I know he is beating himself up so bad over this, because I know he won't sleep tonight.

I've tried to reassure him everything will be okay and tell him not to worry about it, but honestly:

I am just at a loss right now.

I feel like how much more can we take??

I am trying to hold on to the good things that have happened this past week.

Like the fact my grandpa got his catheter out on Friday and things seem to be "going" okay. Though he reminds me numerous times a day that he could still call me at anytime to take him to the doctor or hospital.

Or that after over 8 months the mortgage company has finally said we (my dad) are approved for a home loan modification. The process has been horrible and I honestly am still worried and skeptical, but it is a step in the right direction. Though I did find an email from the mortgage company in my spam folder today saying to call. It was odd because I have only ever emailed one person at the mortgage company. I called and they told me that they accidentally sent us a check for $1400 and that we needed to return it ASAP! Seriously. Such a ridiculous and pathetic company. I am so worried this will foul something up. I wouldn't be surprised.

Did I mention that the unemployment bill still hasn't passed? Looks like it will be end up next week at the earliest. Luckily it will be retroactive. My next check would be for my car payment. which I am thankful for in a way. It's better then rent! I'm good on rent until the end of the month.

Still trying to find a job, but with a 20% unemployment rate in my county and business closing or even burning down (2 in the last few weeks) jobs are hard to come by.

Still trying to sell some of my stuff and even my dads.

Did I mention my niece was hospitalized for two days last week? She's much better now thankfully. While she was in the hospital though her guinea pig died. My other three nieces and I did everything we could to try to save it. It was heartbreaking.

Yeah, when it rains it pours.

I think I need a shower and a good cry.

lately

2010-06-24T22:02:00.001-07:00

In my head I have a blog post written out.

Right now though I just don't have it in me to type it all out.

Plus I doubt anyone would want to read it.

Here's a little summary though.

Warning: It's whiny. It's a downer of a post. Feel free to skip it. I'd totally understand.

--
Here's what I've been up to lately:

3 (nighttime/early morning hour) trips to the ER with Grandpa since Saturday

6 hours - the average length of the our visits

12 trips to my grandpas house 20 minutes away

2 Doctors appointments (for Grandpa)

2 weeks of waiting for a (old) prescription to take effect (again) and hopefully improve things ahead of us

14 days ahead that could involve any number of trips to either the doctor or ER to deal with issues that may arise with his temporary relief until the Rx takes effect

0 - The number of family members who know about our 3rd trip to the ER (what's the point??)

In addition to everything going on with my grandpa I've been dealing with:

1 job interview (no word yet on a second interview. I'm definitely qualified, but in a town with the second highest unemployment in a very large state I won't hold my breath)

1 Bill that Congress can't get passed which means:

2 weeks of income left

2 weeks to figure out how I'm going to get buy/live

1 car that's making a weird noise (which may not be an issue seeing as how I can't pay for it anymore)

So yeah,

I'm feeling:

Stressed.

Frustrated.

Alone.

Worried.

she's grown up

2010-06-12T23:50:00.000-07:00

Someone

had a

BIRTHDAY

today

i can't believe

she's 2!

It seems

like just yesterday

she came home

and

was so

itty bitty

{I use to take her to work with me} :)

--
I LOVE my little monster so much!

You can't tell can you?

that was scary

2010-06-03T23:03:00.000-07:00

I have lived on my own for over 8 years now.

Up until recently it hasn't been something that has worried me or made me nervous.

Actually for the longest time I probably took it too lightly.

When I moved into my first apartment I would often sleep with my sliding glass door wide open to let the cool air in at night.

Definitely not one of my smarter moves.

As the years rolled on I did wise up, but not much.

I stopped sleeping with my sliding glass door open {by that time I was in a downstairs apartment though}. I just left the door open during the day...while I was at work.

I had a good reason though.

You see, not long after moving into that apartment I got a sweet little kitten.

{Apple's checking out her home for the first time}

She so longed to be outside frolicking in {and eating} the grass, chasing butterflies, and watching birds.

Given the opportunity she would bolt out the front door to try to do those things.

I refused to {willing} let her outside. I was in an apartment complex, so it wasn't an ideal place for her to be outside and I was worried for her safety {clearly mine wasn't as much of a concern}.

So in an effort to appease her I would often leave the sliding glass door open and the screen shut so she could gaze outside and hear the birds. {Okay, I am now realizing how mean that may have been!}

Shortly after I moved out of that apartment {into a place with an AWESOME backyard for my munchkin!} a news headline caught my eye. An apartment in my old complex was robbed. The man entered a downstairs apartment through a screen door!

That freaked me out a little.

About six months after that my grandpa was the victim of a home invasion.

Add in all the crappy stuff in the news, the house full of guys that live across the street that are always staring and watching me come and go, and the fact that someone stole my sample boxes of cereal out of my Sunday paper bag recently {I know it's dumb, but it seriously bugs me, after taking them they put my paper on my porch, it's normally on the walkway. It just didn't sit well with me that they came up to my house, who knows maybe they tossed it there, but still.} it doesn't exactly leave you feeling warm and fuzzy.

So yeah, I am slightly more uneasy then I use to be.

Well, the other night though I learned as uneasy as I have become, I am a lot braver {or stupider!} then I thought.

I tend to sleep pretty sound. Not much gets in the way of me and my sleep. I love it. I would marry it if I could.

I have a strong and noisy ceiling fan, plus a fan next to by bed so most noises get drowned out pretty well.

That wasn't the case the other night though.

At about 3am I hearing this loud crashing like sound.

Instantly I scream "Oh my gosh!!," throw my covers off the bed and jump up.

Panic.

I think to myself well this is it. It's happening. Someone's in the house.

My heart begins to race

What do I do?

I head straight down the hallway.

Seriously!

I don't grab the knife that I keep next to my bed or anything.

I just bolt out of my room unarmed and ready to face my fate.

I ended up in the living room and realized no one was in my house.

I then headed back down the hall listening. Nothing. No one trying to get in.

I walk into the bathroom and stand in front of the sink trying to calm down {and wake up!}

I look down and realize what exactly happened.

There was a murderer in the house.

A monstrous little being.

A bug murderer!

I found my blow dryer on the floor and a bottle of lotion, some of my make up, a bottle of hand soap and a half dead fly in the sink.

Somebody got a little too rambunctious during their late night hunting!

Good thing she's cute because she sure scared the heck out of me!

makeover!!

2010-04-03T01:10:00.000-07:00

So I have spent all evening tinkering with my blogs. (So much for watching that movie that I rented and getting to bed at a decent time!) I'm not complaining thought because I got a new look! and I love it It feels SO much better then what I had! Much more me!

I heard about draft blogger on the BF and had to give it a try. Let me just say, it's awesome!!! So easy to use and customize your layout. Three columns are a cinch and you can easily adjust the width of everything, no tinkering around in code. I will customize it more at some point because as much as much as I love this background I am sure it's going to be very popular once it is officially launched.

One down side to this little makeover is that I forgot that I was using Disqus and I lost all my comments, but I am working on getting them back!

This post is actually a little test to see if Disqus is working. I sure hope so! :)

So....What do you think!?!

5 Question Friday - Vlog Style!!

2010-03-26T00:40:00.001-07:00

So I am feeling kind of lazy today so rather then type out my answers for Mama M's

5 Question Friday, I decided I would do it Vlog style!

Hopefully my voice doesn't drive anyone too crazy!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-03-24T14:10:00.000-07:00

interview update

2010-03-19T23:46:00.000-07:00

Once again I have gone too long without blogging. No great excuse. I just have taken the time to sit down and get my thoughts out up until now.
--
I will pick up where I left off: the job interview.

I went, with sweaty palms and a knot in my stomach. Right off the bat I didn't get a good feeling. I walked in and went up to the front counter and stated that I was there for an 11am interview. The girl just stared at me. It was so awkward. I then stammered....do I have a seat and wait?? She then said rather shortly, what is your name? Ahhh, yes, my name, I didn't say my name! Oops! I mean yeah it's helpful, but come on why be so rude? I was nervous. Cut a girl some slack!

After waiting for about 20 minutes the woman I would have been working directly for came out and gave me a tour of the office. As we were walking around she repeatedly looked at my face and then down at what seemed like my chest. I finally had a second and glanced down to make sure that I wasn't flashing her or something. I wasn't. (My shirt wasn't low cut or anything).

I was then led into a room and the woman called in a different girl from the office in to interview me.

Basically she told me they were looking for someone to be at the woman's beckon call and to "read her mind." My hours would have mirrored hers and sometimes that would mean that I would go home at five and get called back in at 7 or asked to come in on a weekend.

So basically I couldn't have much of a life. I will admit I don't have much of one to begin with, but I do have family members who count on me, such as my grandpa....who am I kidding we count on each other! My grocery bill would be a whole lot bigger if it wasn't for him treating me to dinner regularly. :) But I digress.

I did ask why I was being interviewed at that point in time since I applied back in January and just as I suspected they had hired someone back then and they didn't work out. That didn't sit well with me. I get that people don't work out, but still, they want a mind reader remember?

As the interview was winding down she asked if I could give them some additional references, I said yes and she gave me an email address to send them to.

She then asked me to have a seat in the waiting room while she went and met with the boss. I proceed to wait another 20 minutes and she finally came out and just mentioned again sending those references and said they would be in touch.

I sent the references that night (after making sure it was okay with the people) and that was the last of it until this past Monday. I got an email saying that there are a lot of changes going on withing the business and that they have decided to put the position on hold at this time and that they would keep me in mind for the future. It was nice to get a response. I do know they hadn't contected my references seeing as how I told my friend who was one of them..."text me if you hear from her!"

In a way I am relieved. I didn't see myself there and I know that I would have been really stressed and had a lot of anxiety not knowing where I stand. At the same time I am worried and a little stressed over the coming months and finding something else.

As I mentioned before I basically have a job in the future with my friends and it may even mean a move....to Vegas!! (I don't think I mentioned where before. I hear Vegas is actually a great place to live when you get away from the Strip. All I can think about is the Bellagio Buffet! :) I have already checked and there are a number of Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, and an Anthropologie store...all of those place are a good 45 minute drive from me now. No Ikea, but I could make do.)

I just don't know how far out (time wise) it will be. Things are going so well for them. They got some really cool news today and maybe I will share some of it in the future....it may actually be making the news sometime in the near future! I'm excited about the possibilities that lie ahead with their company.

I have worked for these people in the past and they are awesome to work for. Plus an added perk is that I am often times their go to babysitter and I adore their kids....so if they need a babysitter I don't have to worry about work being an issue or taking time off. :)

Plus it's always nice working for people you care about and that care about you.

So that's the update on that.

I am trying to let go of my worries, which has been a struggle. I am continuing to pray and work on trusting that everything will work out in perfect timing even if it means that I take a job elsewhere for a while, who knows maybe I will find something else that's perfect for me!

I have learned so much in the last year and continue to. I am grateful for the lessons I have learned and the experiences I have had.

I am just ready for the next chapter.

looking up

2010-03-03T21:57:00.000-08:00

I have a job interview tomorrow. You would think that after a year and one month of unemployment I would be excited right? Ugh. Not so much. Don't get me wrong I feel really good about it and I am SO VERY grateful for the opportunity. I have already spoken to the woman quite a bit. I think the job would be a good fit for me and them. I think I am just the person they could use! I am just having a hard time being positive about it. I don't like change. I tend to shy away from new things.

I have worked for a family friend for the last 6 years. I am used to working in a relaxed, casual, family like atmosphere . I always know where I stand, how I am doing, and what's going on. I like that security. Right now I feel like I have none. That's hard

My friend and another friend of ours have started a new company (in a new industry) and when the time comes I have a job with them. The time just hasn't come yet. There are some great (huge actually) opportunities on the horizon for them and it seems like it's just a matter of time and there will be for me to. Possibly an opportunity to even relocate. Something I have been wanting to do for a while! Right now I am just waiting and searching for a job. I rather just be waiting, but that's not an option. There are bills to be paid! I dislike the idea of finding a job and then quitting it in the near future. I'm not a quitter, but I wouldn't turn down an opportunity to work for my friends' company.

As hard as it might be and as nervous and worried as I am, I am trying hard to remain positive. I have a good feeling about the future. I have some big goals that I hope to start working towards very soon (more on that later). I am trusting that everything is happening at this time for a reason. And if I get this job it will just be a stepping stone to reaching my goals, whether it's for the short term or long term we shall see.

I think things are finally beginning to look up and I am moving full steam ahead!

13, 37, and 50

2010-02-07T22:41:00.000-08:00

13 years ago today my mom turned 37.

13 years ago today my mom spent the day at the very hospital she was born in.

13 years ago today my mom had her first of two surgeries to remove breast cancer from her body.

13 years ago today my mom wept out of fear.

13 years ago today my mom cried for the comfort of her mother who was traveling to be with her.

(only a few years later her mother would pass away from the same cancer)

13 years ago today my mom wondered if she would live to see her children grow up.

13 years ago today my mom began her fight.

And fight she did.

Today, my mom turned 50.

Today we celebrated!

She won.

Before, Before and After

2010-01-28T14:25:00.000-08:00

Monica over at Pixel Perfect is hosting a fun Before & After photography blog hop today and I am joining in!

For Mother's Day last year I met up with my Mom, my Sister, and her kids,

at a local park for brunch and family pictures.

Prior to taking a group shot of everyone we took some pictures of my Mom & the Grandkids.

For the last few photos my mom got all the kids to make goofy faces with her.

Cute.

(This pictures captures the youngest's personality perfectly!)

Unfortuntaely the goofiness carried over into our group shots.

One of my nieces thought it would be cute to give me bunny ears in every picture.

(And unfortunately we didn't notice until we were uploading the photos,

we were using a tripod to take the photos)

{Before #1}

With the exception of this one.

{Before #2}

Apparently she decided a crazy face would be better

(As did my the oldest niece and what my mom was doing I do not know.)

Of course this picture happens to be the only decent picture of me out of all the group shots.

So using the magic of Photoshop

(and putting to use the few things I managed to learn when I did attend my high school Graphic Communications class :),

I took my face from {Before 2}

and

placed it in {Before 1}

and erased my niece's arm and came up with this:

{After}

I will say my bunny-ear-giving-niece does look a little funny, but one person looking a little funny is better then most everyone looking crazy

(or me looking really BAD!) :)

In the end I think we ended up with a decent picture of everyone.

(I am sure there were a lot of other things I could have done to edit and tweak this picture and make it even better, but by the time I finished the big edits I was d.o.n.e.)

Would you....

2010-01-26T22:25:00.000-08:00

take a ride in something that looks like this:

What if I told you it flies?

very high in the sky:

(much higher than this)

Would you ride in one then?

Would you believe me if I told you I am ridiculously afraid of heights....

but I LOVE flying (as a passenger) in one of these:

and I don't find it the least bit scary?

So....would you?

Five Question Friday!

2010-01-22T16:48:00.000-08:00

It's Friday which means it's time for a little fun!
Here we go...

1. What is better, growing old with out money or dying young and wealthy?

I grew up without much money so I know I can handle growing old without, just as long as I am surrounded by people I love, I'm good.

2. Who takes out the garbage at your house?

Me, myself, or I, and I don't like it. Actually it's putting the new garbage bag in that I really dislike....go figure.

3. Have you ever had the same dream many times?

Yep, there are a few that I have had for many years. They aren't the exact same dreams, but the same experience:

I am on a bridge and I reach out and grab on to power lines and swing and hang from them, all in fun, which is weird considering my next reoccurring dream. (Sometimes family members join in on the fun).

Having to walk across a really high bridge (with an arch) and being freaked out about it. (I am very afraid of heights).

Losing my adult teeth (a fear/worry I have). I even have that gross post tooth loss gum feeling in my dream, blech!

Being in public without a shirt (or bra) on and not being able to find one.

4. Can you play a musical instrument?

Nope. I wish I knew how to play the piano.

5. If you owned your own store, what would you sell?

Gourmet Sandwiches, soups, salads, and cookies

Adding to the family

2010-01-19T12:47:00.000-08:00

This past weekend I went up to the ranch to welcome the newest addition to the family.

She is a year old filly with blond hair and blue eyes. Her name (appropriately) is: Blondie.

(She arrived with a name).

Not everyone is excited about her arrival though (which is normal):

With time the jealousy and rivalry will be gone and she will become an accepted part of the family.

Until then she is being kept separate from the other horses.

And there have been a few pep talks and a little extra love given out

Along with a little extra hay being served

As for the other animals

I think it's safe to say they are far from impressed or concerned

In need of a makeover

2010-01-17T21:57:00.000-08:00

My blog that is. Though, I am sure I would really benefit from one too!

I am so over my current header, colors, all of it really. It needs to change.

I have been wanting to redo it for weeks now.

The problem is. I am just drawing a total blank on a new name. I am sure I can come up with a new header and all no problem, it's just I need a new name to work with.

So I am thinking if I put it out there that I want to (and truthfully NEED TO) spruce things up around here maybe it will motivate me and I will come up a new name and a snazzy, new layout.

One can hope at least.

And if that doesn't work....at least everyone will know that I am aware that my blog is blah looking. :)

If you have any suggestions I would love to hear them!

Getting to know you!

2010-01-17T21:27:00.000-08:00

It's Sunday which means it's time for a little bit of Getting to Know You fun brought to us by Keely. Not only is she a cool chick she is also very sweet and generous, she is giving 25 cents to the Red Cross for each person that joins in and links up. So check out her blog and join in on the fun!

1. Hair color..Au naturale..or not?

This is a tricky question to answer. My natural hair color is blond, but over the last few years it started to get just a little darker and was starting to become a color that wasn't totally blond, but not quite brown either. In other words, it needed some highlights. So I started getting some lighter blond highlights. Well, the maintenance can be pricey and right now it just doesn't fit into the budget., the last time I got my highlighted was February, so almost a year ago. The funny thing is, I don't really have roots, my hair is still totally blond. I have even been asked a number of times by my mom and once by my brother (who knew he noticed my hair!?!) if I got my hair highlighted recently. Which makes me feel pretty darn good. So, yeah all that to say, I don't really know, for sure but I think I will go with au naturale. :)

2. If somebody has food in their teeth or lipstick on their teeth do you tell them?

I would say 75% of the time......no. For some reason it embarrasses me!?!? (I know, go figure!!)

3. Would you rather have a million dollars or your vision of the perfect body?

Hands down a million dollars. I could use it to get the chin implant and lipo that I want. **grin**

4. Favorite magazine?

The Food Network Magazine (love it!!)

5. Bra style..lacey or plain?

Plain. (I am not even sure they make lacy bras in my size.)

6. If you walked into Victoria's Secret..would you most likely come out with something sexy or comfy?

I would come out empty handed most likely, but if I had to by something it would be comfy, at this point in my life.

7. Do you fake and bake?

I did for a while a few years ago because a friend got me gift cards a couple of times. I liked having a little color, but it can be pricey (especially the lotion!) so I quit going once I used up the credits. Plus there is that whole not being good for you thing. I am not opposed to getting a a little bit of color naturally from the sun, it just doesn't happen much. *gasp* I know in, live in California and rarely get a tan, it's just crazy.

8. What's your favorite body part on a man?

Lips. Eyes. Arms.

Five Question Friday!

2010-01-15T21:34:00.000-08:00

It's been a while since I have joined in on the Five Question Friday fun and since I have been slacking in the blogging department (not feeling it t to be honest) I thought I would join in for some good ole, easy, blogging fun! So here we go:

1. Worst trouble you ever got into as a teenager?

The only thing I could come up with is actually really dumb and trivial. My mom has a flair for drama, she likes to make little things big and since I was a good teenager that is what she did to make life exciting! :)

Anyways.

One night a friend and I were hanging out. There were a few guys that I went to church with that we would hang out with sometimes, but we were not that night. I kind of sort of "liked" one of the guys. Well we tracked down his car at one of the other friend's houses. (What can I say...we live in a small town with very little to do.) My friend wanted to egg his car (for fun) and I was not on board. I was a chicken and just didn't want to. I went ahead and went to the grocery store with her where she purchased eggs, flour, and this little tiny gangster looking figurine from one of those 25 cent machines (just being goofy). We went back to where his car was and I was not having any of it. Since I was being Debbie Downer my friend ended up just cracking one egg on the bumper of his car (seriously breaking the egg and neatly placing it on his bumper) and leaving the little gangster guy on the back of his car. That was it. Pathetic, I know. Especially considering the revenge that was to come. My friend had to work the next morning so we decided to call it a night and we went home. The next morning I was just getting up and around and my mom looks outside and sees something on my car. She goes outside to get a closer look and finds my car covered in ROTTEN chopped up fish and the liquid/juice it had been sitting. She went off, saying she was going to call the cops and going off and asking who would do such a thing? The only thing I could come up with that it must have been the guy who's car my friend PUT an egg on. So I told my mom about that. She was so angry! Telling me you don't mess with people's cars and just going on and on. It didn't matter that I was against the whole thing and what was done to his car was nothing really. I have to say though even though my mom was furious.....she cleaned off my car!! Ha!! :D I then got a call from my friend on her way to work. She too discovered her car in the same condition. Unfortunately she was dressed and leaving for work and only had a minute quickly rinse off her car and leave. She was not happy and was sure she smelled like rotten fish.

The whole thing was actually pretty funny. Well my mom didn't think so. There really wasn't any long term punishment (my mom never stuck to anything anways). Though dealing with her wrath in the moment was not fun or funny.

2. Are you a morning person or a night person?

Night!!

3. Are you a one-handed or a two-handed Texter?

Two, I think.

4. Democrat, Republican, or Independent..or maybe even Green Party (whatever that is).

I keep an open mind, but I do tend to lean more towards conservative.

5. Are you a pet person?

I am a puppy and kitten person. I still get teased that as I kid I would get a puppy or kitten and once it got bigger and not so cute I wouldn't want it anymore.

Honestly though, I didn't really think I was a pet person. I debated over getting my cat for quite sometime, but in the end I couldn't resist a kitten. Now that I have had her a year and a half, I couldn't imagine not having her. She is so weird and sweet and mean and goofy. I just love her to pieces! She is seriously like my child and she acts like one, I can't even hardly use the bathroom without her whining at the door! Her child like behaviors are crazy.

Interesting evening

2010-01-12T00:49:00.000-08:00

Tonight night I went to the gym to workout around 8:30. I had been in a bad mood all day (okay who am I kidding I have been in a bad mood for the last week it seems) . Anyways, as I got out of my car I pressed the lock button. After I closed the door I decided to grab a bottle of water from the case in my backseat so I unlocked the car, grabbed a bottle of water, locked the car and headed into the the gym.

I got on the treadmill and proceeded to begin my couch to 5k training program. I don't know what the deal was but the treadmill I selected had a mind of it's own. First off it paused itself a few times. Then when I would enter a speed it would climb a little ways above that speed and then drop back down to the speed I selected, so if I entered a challenging speed, it got even more challenging for a few seconds. A couple of times I had to pause the treadmill and when I hit resume rather then speed slowly building, the timer came on and the belt didn't move until I pressed the speed increase button. My running coach/app on my phone paused itself once as well. AND the tv remote all of a sudden quit working while I was using it.

It was all so odd. I should have taken that as a sign and just stopped after my run. But I didn't.

Once I finished running I did an ab workout which came to a quick end because of a sudden onset of nausea! After darting to the bathroom and coming very close to throwing up I decided I had enough for one evening and better leave.

I grabbed my keys and headed for my car. As I was opening my door I noticed that my driver side window was rolled almost completely down. I got into the car looked over and the passenger side window was also down. I quickly glanced at the passenger seat of the car....thankfully my purse and wallet were still sitting in the seat where I had left them.

I must have held down the unlock button a little too long when I grabbed my water, causing the windows to roll down. Not sure how I missed that one though.

Now I am home and feeling better.

It was definitely an interesting evening though!

On my way!

2010-01-02T08:30:00.000-08:00

It's a day late, but I'm hitting the road, heading to the resort for my mini vacation.

Yesterday morning my mom called to tell me that the highway (that she assumed we were taking) had chain requirements because of snow. I told her I planned on taking a different highway, so she checked and chains were required on that one as well. I did purchase chains (actually, my Dad them), but I really would rather not have to use them. So we postponed our trip until today.

This whole weather related hang up did raise a little concern.

You see the highway that she thought we were taking scared the bejeebies out of me when I drove it for the first (and only) time a couple years ago. Well, the highway that I told her I planned on taking (it's a better route to get to the resort) was the highway that she thinks is awful and was hoping to avoid.

So as it stands the highway she prefers and that we are not taking, scared me witless and aged me ten years last time I drove it. The highway that we are taking scares her and I have never driven it. So I am just wondering, if her way scares me and not her.....how am I going to feel about the new to-me-highway that scares her? (Did that make sense?)

So, yeah, it's safe to say I'm nervous.

At least it isn't suppose to be snowing.

I am so grateful for prayer and the peace and protection it can bring!

So if you see someone driving through the mountains of California going 5 mph feel free to wave, just know I am probably unable to pry my hands off the steering wheel to wave back, but I am waving in my head!

Twenty-Ten

2009-12-31T22:49:00.000-08:00

"Try a little harder to be a little better"

{Gordon B. Hinkley}

This is my motto for the year 2010.

There are many areas of my life that can use improvement.

But I am not going to set big goals for myself that I most likely will fail to meet.

I am just going to try {harder} to be better.

Here are some of the things

I am going to try {harder} to:

Seek out opportunities to serve and help others

Be better about spending time studying my scriptures & praying

{Continue to} Make exercise a regular part of my life/day

Be more productive with the time in my days

Exercise more patience

Make good financial decisions

Pursue business and career opportunities to the fullest
Keep in better contact with my older brother
BLOG MORE!

I would love to hear what you are going to try to do better in the new year.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

I'm Going on Vacation!

2009-12-29T18:42:00.000-08:00

I am so excited! I am going on a REAL (mini) vacation! I have never really been on vacation. Pretty much every trip I have been on has been because of a birth, death, marriage, or business. I guess they may count as vacations a little.

But this trip: is strictly for fun & relaxation. And boy can I sure use it right now!

The best part: IT'S FREE!

Ok, it will cost, me the gas to get there. But that's it. My sister is going to buy the groceries. (We will have a kitchen so no need to eat out.)

There is an indoor pool, fitness center, tennis and basketball courts,, and more. Plus it's in the mountains so there's snow! I haven't been to the snow in probably 10 years.

It is about a 2 hour drive and the weather is suppose to be great!

I bet you are wondering how I ended up with this opportunity. Well....

Some (awesome) friends of mine recently sold their timeshare, but still have a week remaining that is theirs to use. They booked a week at a resort from this Friday to next Friday, however they won't be heading to the resort until Monday, so the condo will be empty for four days. A condo is a sad thing to waste. So they called to see if I would be interested in going up before them and making good use of the condo. Of course!! I am so blessed! And excited!

So on Friday afternoon, my mom, my sister, my youngest niece and possibly my brother will be heading north to the mountains!

What a great way to start off the New Year!

I hope and pray that you have a blessed, healthy, and HAPPY New Year!

I am also hoping (and praying!) that everyone gets along and I don't wind up wishing I went alone! I plan on giving out a little pre-trip lecture, just to safe. :D

Getting to Know You!

2009-12-20T12:11:00.000-08:00

I am joining in on Keely's fun, Sunday,

Getting to Know You blog carnival!

1. Middle name?

Don't have one. :(

I hate it that I don't. When I get married my maiden name will most likely become my middle name.

My mom, grandma, great grandmother, and great-great grandmother don’t have middle names either. That tradition is ending with me! There are too many great girl names on my list that I want to use up! I may even give my first girl two middle names to really rebel! :)

2. What do you think is your best asset (physical)?

Arms

3. If you could only eat one type of cuisine for a year, what would it be (Mexican, American,Chinese..etc.)?

Italian (I could live off of tomato & basil bruschetta)

4. Walmart or Target?

Target!!

5. Favorite State besides the one you live in?

If I can pick a state I have never been to (because I think I would love it!):

Hawaii

Otherwise: Utah (I have been to very few states)

6. What side of the bed do you sleep on, left or right?

The middle! Or whatever side my cat isn't hogging.

7. King or Queen size bed?

Full.

It works just fine since it's just me, but the next furniture I buy will be a new bedroom set. Not sure on the size yet.

8. Beer or wine?

Neither

9. Water..ice-cold or room temp?

Room-temp (usually). I actually don't like water. I have to force myself to drink it.

10. Christmas..love it or hate it?

Both

I try to keep the reason for the season at the forefront of my mind. But to be honest....holidays are usually a little tough. They make me pretty bummed (more than usual) that I don't have kids yet.

--
That was fun!! Thanks Keely!

Five Question Friday!

2009-12-18T23:30:00.000-08:00

Well Friday is almost over, but I am joining in on Mama M's, Five Question Friday at the last minute.

Here we go!

1. Which boygroup did you like most in your teens?

I loved 'N Sync. I thought Justin Timberlake was hot!! (I was young and stupid) Now I find him gross!

Prior to my teen years though I was a HUGE New Kids on the Block fan.

2. Do you do Christmas cards, letters, photos, nuthin', all of the above?

Nuthin'

I do occasionally include a card with some baked goods, but that's about it.

3. If you could meet one celebrity who would it be and why?

I know this probably won't be a popular answer, but Angelina Jolie. I so admire her humanitarian work, her love for orphans, the way she travels around the world. She gives 1/4 of her income to charity, last year she gave 7 million dollars. She is active and passionate about helping improve the lives of others and I admire that.

I also like the variety of characters she plays in movies.

4. Favorite thing to cook with (i.e. stainless, non-stick, Dutch oven, microwave, debit card...or, perhaps, a cauldron, etc.)?

My Rachael Ray pans, two enamel coated cast iron and a not stick pasta pot.

5. What is the one thing you wear the most, besides your unmentionables?

I always have a black elastic hair tie on my wrist. It's a must. I have a hard time doing some things without my hair pulled back. (like cooking, cleaning, etc.) Which stinks because I don't look great at all with my hair pulled back.

As usual, that was fun!

It's Thursday and I'm Thankful

2009-12-10T23:02:00.000-08:00

It's Thursday for another hour and as I was winding down for the night I was reflecting on this past week and realized that I have a lot to be thankful for! So here I am, joining in on Thankful Thursday, hosted by The Nut House.

My dad is currently going through a divorce and to help him out I manage all of his finances. I discovered the other day that I missed a due date on a credit card bill. I was panicked to say the least, the card has a fairly large balance @ 0% interest, a late payment could mean a rate increase. I paid the bill, prayed about the situation and did my best not to worry. A few days later I got an email that their was a new statement posted online. Shaking a little I logged into the account. And there it was, the new interest rate. A much higher interest rate! I was devastated. I spent half the day literally sick to my stomach. I prayed for peace and that everything would work out and then a call was made to the credit card company explaining what happened (the due date was a few days earlier than I was use to and with the holiday I just missed it, the money was there to pay it). I even volunteered to sign up for automatic payments. The man on the phone was wonderful. He not only took the interest rate back to 0% (because of the good account history), he even credited the late fee charge. I was in tears!! I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who hears and answers prayers and provides comfort!

I am also grateful for exciting business opportunities that have been presented to me this week!

I am grateful for the people in my life who believe in me, encourage me, and who I can count on.

I am thankful that the cold front we have been experiencing the last few days is finally gone! My house is so not made for the freezing temperatures. Though I am very grateful that I do have heat!

I am thankful that my dad is in a much better place mentally, physically, and spiritually and that he is excelling at his job! Another answer to prayer!

I am thankful for my grandpa. He is so good to me. If it wasn't for him I might starve. Okay, maybe not starve, but I would definitely not eat as good as I do. (Though I might loose a few pounds, which wouldn't be bad!) :)

Ahhhhh, what a great way to end the day! Recognizing my blessing and giving thanks for them!

(animal) life on the ranch

2009-12-10T21:08:00.000-08:00

I am very much a city girl.

I am also very much a country girl.

My dad lives on 20 acres up in the hills. His house is located about 1.5 miles down a gravel/dirt/occasionally paved road. I love it up there. He has three horses. Tons of kittens (not by choice). Chickens. And a sweet dog. It is such a peaceful and fun place to be.

At night you can often hear coyotes yapping in the distance. Such was the case when I stayed at his house recently. I was actually awoken(?) in the middle of the night by coyotes howling in the distance.

The thing is though the coyotes aren't always "in the distance." They do wander onto my dad's property from time to time and they aren't the friendliest visitors.

A few weeks ago my dad was looking out a window and spotted a coyote ~~in the~~ ~~yard~~ on the property. The coyote quickly approached a chicken and snatched it up and took off. Next thing he knows his sweet dog, Rusty was running after the coyote!! Before my dad could even get outside the coyote (with the chicken still in his mouth) and Rusty disappear into some bushes. Next thing he knows Rusty is trotting back towards the house.....with the chicken running ahead of him and no sign of the coyote! His dog saved the chicken!

I love that dog even more now!

(i think at the top of the picture is actually a chicken)

---

So as I mentioned my dad has a bunch of kittens running around his property. It is actually a little bit of a sore subject because when his soon to be ex-wife moved out she left her cats and all the kittens. (She did take the ceiling fans though!) Anyways. A couple weeks ago my dad realized he was out of mayonnaise and needed to run and pick some for his lunch the next day. So he hopped in his truck and drove to the nearest store. After returning home he went inside and started to make his lunch. As he was doing so he heard an animal crying outside. Clearly it was in distress. After a few minutes the animal was still crying out, so he decided he better go check to see what was going on. He walked outside and followed the sound of the crying animal. It was coming from his truck. Just as he approached his truck a little kitten hoped down from under the truck by the tire and runs off.

Apparently he wasn't alone on his trip to the store. The kitten rode along up under the truck somewhere near the time. All 20 miles at 65 mph!

That had to have been some ride!

Being Green saves Green

2009-12-08T13:31:00.000-08:00

Today I am joining Brianne over at Mommy's Time and listing a few of my "green" tips!

There's no doubt that being "green" is good for the planet. I am sure we can all agree that we care about the planet. Whether we believe in global warming or not. For me though, one big motivation for trying to be green is that it saves money. Here are a few things that I do that are "green" that help to save green! I am sure ~~most~~ many of them you have probably heard before, but I am going to mention them anyways!) :)

I use towels instead of napkins. I am sure cloth napkins would probably be a lot classier (and look nicer), I may invest in some at some point, but for now I just grab a dish towel when I sit down to eat. (I love to buy dish towels at Ikea...there's a bonus tip not only are they inexpensive, Ikea is actually a pretty green company!).

Magic erasers are my weapon of choice for a lot of my cleaning. They pick up junk and gunk (with little effort on my part might I add) which means that I don't have to use harsh cleaners. (I even use them to clean stuck on food off of my enamel coated cast iron pots.) I also use vinegar, water and baking soda or when I have a coupon I like Colorox Green Works multi purpose (or is it surface?) cleaner as well for cleaning.

I recently switched from waterproof mascara to non waterproof. When I was wearing waterproof mascara I always was buying Neutrogena make up removing wipes to get it off. So now that I have cut out waterproof mascara I have cut out my need for the wipes, which cuts back on waste (trash) and save me money (those things weren't cheap)!

Re-usuable grocery totes. They are not only way easier to carry, they can also save money. A few stores (Winco, Food Maxx, Target (yay!!) and Bel Air) in my area and probably yours too offer a credit of about 5 cents per bag you bring into use. You can usually pick up bags for about $0.99 each or you can make your own out of old grocery bags!

Eat less meat. Not only is it better for your health and your wallet, it's better for the environment. Animals raised for consumption (that sounds gross) produce more emissions than cars!

Well those are my tips!

Be green and save green.

Wow, did I really abuse and over use the parenthesis in this post!!

20's and Tomatoes

2009-12-07T11:53:00.000-08:00

Literally overnight my tomato plants went from this:

To this:

That's what temperatures in the 20's (with wind) will do for ya!

(My dad was eating tomatoes off the vine on Friday afternoon!)

---

Clearly I didn't get around to taking out my garden last week. I am blaming it on the mouse that my cat was playing with that ran into the tomato bushes to hide!

Tomato Plants in November

2009-12-01T00:21:00.000-08:00

This past March I planted a garden. My garden included 5 tomato plants. Two of those tomato plants took over the garden.

A couple weeks ago I took some picture of my garden.

My garden in November:

It get's better though, tomatoes are actually growing:

Oh, but wait, I'm not done yet, look closely:

Let me make it a little easier:

Yes, those are blossoms. There are blossoms on my tomato plants in November!

It's not like it has been super warm here.

(Yes I know what is cold to me is warm to many in other parts of the country!)

And we haven't gotten a lot of rain.

But they keep growing none the less.

Though I do think part of it may be that the weeds are getting so tall that the tomato plants are being pushed upwards making them look tall and bushy.

I haven't weeded the garden since like, oh I don't know June!

To be honest I haven't picked tomatos in weeks.

Okay, Okay

It has been a month or two since I picked tomatoes.

There I admitted it!

And watering. I have watered about once in a few months.

I know that's bad.

I am just so over it.

I can only make so many batches of Tomato & Basil Bruschetta.

Plus it's cold outside (to me at least).

Tomatoes or not those plants have to go.

This week I am ripping out the garden.

I mean it this time.

Hopefully.

After all it is December.

You can't have tomato plants in December!!

Thanksgiving with the ex's

2009-11-24T11:09:00.000-08:00

Well I survived Thanksgiving (though my feet almost didn't, ouch)!

I hosted the dinner at my dad's house. I drove up the night before with my mom, cooked dinner, brined the turkey, and spent the night. It was the first time I can recall being under the same roof as my (divorced) parents. That was a little odd.

We had quite the mix of people for dinner:

My Mom (ie my dad's ex)
My Dad (ie my mom's ex)
My little Brother
My little Brother's dad (ie my mom's other ex)
Little Brother's Dad's girlfriend
My (technically, but not in my book, ex)uncle (my aunt's ex husband, he harassed me to no end about eating so early, but I love him!)
My Grandpa (mom's dad)

I did all the planning and much of the cooking. My mom was my "sous chef" and did what I asked! :) I was really pleased how everything turned out! I even tried a couple new recipes and was thrilled with the results!

I am so bummed that I didn't take any pictures.

I was just too busy with cooking and clean up.

Actually that isn't entirely true.

I did take quite a few pictures.

None of people though. And that's what I am bummed about.

The pictures I took were in the morning before anyone arrived and during clean up. And they were all of animals.

When my dad's soon to be ex wife moved out recently she left behind a ton of kittens (she took the ceiling fans though, long story, short version: she's a piece of work and really materialistic!).

There are two different size kittens, teeny tiny and tiny. And boy are they cute!

In the morning the horses come up to the house basically demanding breakfast and the kittens & chickens run around together and play.

One kitten in particular found something fun to play with as the horses stood up near the house and I had to take picture :

the horse's tail!!!
luckily it chose a good natured horse who doesn't mind.
(sorry for the bad quality photo, I had to take it through the window, if I stepped out on to the porch I would have spooked the kitten!)

We can't help but wonder if the kittens think they are chickens:

When I finally sat down to eat my dinner I noticed the dog staring at me through the screen door, I have always been told it is rude to eat in front of others so, I made him a (small) plate of turkey.........with gravy. ( He scarfed the turkey and gravy and nearly the plate, but I won that battle) After I fed the dog, I noticed.........the kittens, oh my, the kittens!! I couldn't leave them out:

and clearly I didn't
(those are just a few of many)

Then came clean up time. Which means pulling the meat off the turkey. Which means there are scraps. Well the dog ran off and so did all but one of the kittens. The one kitten that remained, he is one smart little kitten and he has the belly to prove it! I have never seen a belly like this on a kitten. My grandpa commented that it looks pregnant. So this little kitten got dibs on the goodies I set out and ate until full.

You can't get close to any of the other kittens, but this one, oh (s)he is a lover. I even got to pick it up (it was purring like crazy). I so, almost brought it home!

I snapped quite a few pictures, here are a few of my favorites:

look at that belly!!

after dinner bath

yawn! time for a nap. turkey will do that to you!

A yawn is the perfect way to sum up Thanksgiving day!

Seriously though,

All in all it was a good, peaceful, and enjoyable holiday.

And for that I am thankful!

Encounter with a Black Widow

2009-11-18T11:42:00.000-08:00

I live in an old house and for some time now I have been battling critters. Spiders, moths, ants, etc. (Thankfully no mice, they make me crazy!!!)

Well, for a few months now on occasion I have either called or sent texts with questions and/or pictures to a friend asking how you identify a black widow or asking if "this" is a black widow or "what is this!?!" Each time my friend has patiently responded by either identifying the bug or telling me "no it's not a black widow, a black widow looks like...." or "that's a praying mantis, they are good" Finally after having a black widow described to me a number of times, I actually committed the info to memory. (Yay me!!)

Well the other night......that info came in handy!!! My neighbor had knocked on my door asking if he could borrow my lawn mower the next day. I told him sure just get it out of the backyard whenever he needed and that I would get the gas can out of the storage closet outside and set it out for him. After he left I went out side and opened the door to the storage closet, I stuck my hand in trying to feel for the light switch. I ended up sticking my hand into a bunch of spider webs and before I got to the light switch I noticed the gas can and grabbed it. As I was getting ready to close the door I had a feeling that it might be a good idea to get rid of the spider webs since they were right by/on the light switch (I was thinking fire hazard for some reason, I don't know how it would be, but I just felt like I need to deal with the spider webs). So I reached in and found the light switch. Upon flipping on the light switch I spotted this:

!!!!!!!!!!!!

(night time + phone camera + panic = bad picture)

I quickly took a picture and sent it to my critter identifying friend asking "What does a black widow look like again!?!?" (For the record, I was ~~pretty much~~ positive this time I had in fact encountered one!)

I then realized as much as I hate the sound of squishing, popping, killing bugs, I had to kill it! Oh boy but with what!?!? I spotted a little statue/figurine thing that my mom had been given and then gave to me. I have never been too fond of it...well up until that point!

So, I sucked it up and used my new found friend to squash the nasty spider!!

Thanks to the experience I have gained a slight appreciation for that bird and a big appreciation for my critter identifying friend!

I am sure I won't forget what a black widow looks like now!!!

Not Me Monday!

2009-11-15T20:22:00.000-08:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

As I was driving down the (private) dirt road that leads to my grandpas house recently I did not drift off the road into a swale full of brush and weeds. I was not distracted because I was looking up recipes for sugar cookie dough on my cell phone.

The other day I did not accidentally knock a glass jar of Pig's Feet off the top shelf at the grocery store while trying to reach something for my grandpa. I was not thrilled when I realized the jar hit the floor and didn't break!! (That would have been a disgusting mess! Or at least I imagine it would be.)

While running late to pick my grandpa up for an appointment last week I did not discover that the clock in my car is two minutes slow, meaning I was running an additional two minutes later than I thought. I did not come up with the genius idea to set the clock back an additional two minutes to make it appear that I was less late then I actually was and to avoid grandpa fussing over possibly being late for his appointment. Nope not me! I would never stoop to such a level! (For the record we were on time to his appointment, one might say even early, well if you if they were looking at my clock that is! And, no he never looked at my clock, he did glance at his watch though!)

Butternut Squash Soup

2009-11-11T15:23:00.000-08:00

One of the many reason I love fall and winter time is because it's soup time.

Here is one of my favorites soups. It's rich, creamy, and quite tasty.

Butternut Squash Soup

ingredients: butternut squash, chicken broth, cream cheese, onion, butter,
marjoram, pepper, cayenne pepper, and salt (not pictured)

melt butter in a soup pot - roughly chop onion - saute in melted butter

peel and chop squash

add squash, broth, marjoram, and pepper to pot. season with salt. simmer

cube cream cheese and add to soup. stir to combine

remove soup from heat. blend until smooth.

(i love my immersion blender for tasks like this, if you don't have one, blend (in batches) in a regular blender and be sure to vent the top just a little to let the steam escape)

return soup to stove top and reheat if necessary/desired

enjoy!!

Butternut Squash Soup
Yields: 6 Servings

1 small onion, chopped
4 tablespoons butter or margarine
6 cups Butternut Squash, peeled and cubed
4 cups chicken stock
½ teaspoon dried marjoram
¼ teaspoon ground black pepper
1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese

In a large saucepan, sauté onions in butter until tender. Add squash, stock, marjoram, black pepper, and cayenne pepper. Bring to boil; cook 20 minutes or until squash is tender.

Puree squash and cream cheese in a blender or food processor in batches until smooth. Return to saucepan and heat through. Do not allow to boil.

Five Question Friday....a little late

2009-11-06T23:14:00.000-08:00

It's Friday for another 46 minutes so I am joining in!

1. What is your dream job?

Stay at home mom & wife

2. What song could you play over and over?

I can't say there is a specific song. I tend to go through spurts where there is a song I love and then I end up burning myself out on it.

Night Ranger's Goodbye & many Bryan Adams songs (Have you ever really loved a woman, Please forgive me, Heaven, etc.) are always on my play list.

A couple current songs I listen to regularly right now are: Smile by Uncle Kracker & Need You Now by Lady Antebellum

3. Do you prefer to talk on the phone or text (or email)?

Usually text or email. It just depends who it is and what I have to say.

I am not a fan of making calls to anyone I don't know really well.

At work I used to avoid making phone calls as much as possible. If I could, I would email.

4. What is your must have beauty product?

Can't pick just one, have to have my mineral face powder (bad skin) and eyeliner & mascara (blonde eyelashes).

5. What is your favorite Michael Jackson song?

I loved Black or White when I was little. I remember taking the cassette tape with that song on it to daycare with me.

Now I would have to say Man in the Mirror.

That was fun. Now...sleep.

Dinner with Grandpa: Conversations & Observations

2009-10-26T21:05:00.000-07:00

The other evening I was out to dinner with my grandpa and I over heard the following conversation between an old married couple:

Wife: You weren't grumpy when I married you
Husband: Yes I was
Wife: No you weren't, you were not grumpy
Husband (rather grumpily): Yes I was grumpy, I have always been grumpy, That is just how I am. I'm grumpy.
Wife: You were not grumpy when I married you. I don't marry grumpy people.

I got the biggest kick out of what she said: "I don't marry grumpy people." I couldn't help but think...how many times has she been married!?!? :)

....

About a week ago while my grandpa and I were waiting for our entrees to arrive I was scanning the dining room and a couple at a table nearby caught my eye. The man must have been at least in his 60's and he and his wife had ordered pizza for dinner. I watched the man eat slice after slice of pizza......toppings only! Seriously I couldn't believe it, a grown man eating only the topping off of his pizza. I felt like I was watching an over grown toddler. It was so funny!!

....

Ok the doozey, the big one. Except this conversation....it happened at my table. Oh my! It was horrible. Awful I tell ya. See my grandpa is hard of hearing, but the evening the following conversation took place he was having an exceptionally hard time hearing, which means I have to talk a even louder than usual (which bugs). And which also means he talks a little louder. Not good I tell ya!

Ok so we already know that I am not so good talking about private/personal stuff from this post. So here's what happened.

Grandpa: I am wondering if you can answer a question for me. It may be a little inappropriate, I don't know....what's a camel "foot" (for the sake of who could end up on my blog because of good ole google I am changing one of the words slightly)

Me: *shocked* oh wow! *face red*

Grandpa: There is a column in the newspaper and teens can write in and ask questions and then the questions are answered by other teens. A girl about 15 years old wrote it and basically asked how $lutty she should dress for Halloween (what!?!?!). And the word camel "foot" was used a few times. At first I thought it was referring to something you wear on your foot like an accessory, but then I began to think that wasn't what they were referring to.

Me: Oh, uhm. Yeah it isn't an accessory!

Grandpa: Well, is it referring to what I am thinking....

Me: Uhm, yeah probably (assuming he was thinking correctly because he was being vague)

Grandpa: (waves his hand in front of his chest) a low cut blouse showing too much?

Me: *thinking: dang he doesn't have it figured out* Uhhhh, nope that's not it. Much worse than that.

Grandpa: Who could I get to tell me what it is referring to? (because clearily I was not volunteering and was squirming)

Me: (in my head: oh my gosh, make this stop!!) Hmmmmm, I don't know.....

Grandpa: *still wanting to know what it's referring to*

Me: *pulling note pad out of purse* Do you have a pen?

Grandpa: (hands me a pen)

Me: *i write: "think wedgie, but in the front"* (it's the best I could come up with, while trying to answer his questions but still be vague and not freak out!!)

Me: (pass note to Grandpa)

Grandpa: Reading, thinking, pondering, acts like he has an idea what I am talking about

Grandpa: So top half (waves hand in front of chest) or lower half

Me: *mumbling* lower half (thinking: are we still having this conversation)

Grandpa: what? (remember hard of hearing)

Me: *a little louder* lower

Grandpa: Oh, ok

Me: (still not convinced he gets it)

Thankfully the conversation changed at this point! Luckily the restaurant was fairly empty during our exchange but still someone could very well have (and probably heard) some of what was said! Awkward! Embarrassing!

But guess what...it didn't end there! Nope I was officially embarrassed one last time before we made it out the door.

Me & Grandpa stand up getting ready to leave.

Grandpa: Where's my pen

Me: Oh, hmmm you know what it's probably in my purse. *dig in purse, find pen, hand him pen*

Grandpa: Oh yeah, that's right you were using it when you were trying to tell me what CAMEL "FOOT" means

Me: shhhhhhhh *blushing, putting head down, utterly, totally embarrassed! there was 3 people (2 middle aged adults and an elderly woman) in the booth right behind us.

Grandpa: chuckles

Me: *thinking: he still doesn't get what that's referring to or he would not have just said that!!!*

Me: *done trying to get him to understand*

Holy cow! What an evening. At least I handled it better than the conversation about my breasts!

*for the record my grandpa isn't some weirdo. he is 77 years old and doesn't get out much. he had no idea what he was saying or what that meant (clearly)....and he still really doesn't I don't think. :)*

Update:
I found the the column that my grandpa was referring to that brought about the question. It seems that they added the "real" definition. Maybe I should print it out and give it to him. Or not! Don't think I want to revisit that subject!

Not Me Monday!

2009-10-26T15:30:00.001-07:00

It's Not Me Monday! Join in, it's fun and therapeutic and while your at it hop on over to MckMama's place and check out what others have not been up to!

I did not recently follow a man around Wal Mart like a crazy woman in an attempt to get a picture of the crazy (pajama) pants he was wearing because it reminded me of this discussion in MckMama's Blog Frog Community.

(They had Homer and Marge Simpson all over them. It's hard to walk and get close enough to someone in order to get a decent picture without them suspecting!)

I did not tease a friend's little boy (who I adore and love to pieces!) about having the "pig flu" I didn't ask him if he had been kissing pigs or grew a curly little tail . I would never make light of something that is so concerning to so many. (He has been running a fever and feeling crummy for about 5 days now, not throwing up or anything. He was thought to be over it, but it appears to be hanging on still, no official test diagnosing it, just what his uncle who is a doctor thinks it might be. Whatever it is, I have been exposed to it now.)

I do not currently have every food item in my house, with the exception of canned goods, stored in my refrigerator due to my recent pantry moth problem. I am not about ready to scream over the problem (that I don't have).

I did not have a very awkward conversation with my grandpa (once again!) over dinner last night. (And if I did you can sure bet I will not be sharing more about it later!)

Wordless Wednesday

2009-10-21T07:36:00.000-07:00

It's Not Me Monday!!

2009-10-19T06:23:00.000-07:00

It's Monday and that means it's time to fess up or not to all the crazy things I may or may not have done this past week. Check out MckMama's awesome blog and see what others have not been up to or done recently.

I most certainly have not been in a ridiculous funk for the last week. I am always happy, positive, energetic, and optimistic. I am never moody, frustrated, grumpy, confused, and feel all around yuck! Nope not me!

I most certainly did not make five trips to the same store in 2 days in an effort to find fall/winter clothes. If I did happen to make 5 trips my visits did not go like this:

Trip one: Park car. Sit in car & try to convince myself to get out of the car and go shopping for fall clothes. Fail to do so. Leave parking lot and drive home.
Trip two: Couple hours later return to store. Go inside, find an awesome jacket. Do not buy awesome jacket.
Trip three: Return, again, a couple hours later to same store. Try on jacket, again. Again don't buy jacket. Still like it.

Next day
Trip four: Buy jacket.
Trip five: (two hours after buying jacket) Return jacket after deciding jacket is a little to dressy and not practical enough, though still awesome. While in line pray that the cashier who rang up your purchase two hours prior isn't the one to process your return...prayers answered. Close call though!

As I said, I'm not in a funk!

This past week I did not open my storage shed and discover a crazy looking bug. I did not send a picture text to a friend asking what type of bug it was. After learning that the scary bug was in fact a praying mantis, my next text did not say: "Kill it!!" After my ~~demand~~ request, I learned that they are actually good at eating bugs. After learning that useful bit of information, I did not consider turning it loose in my house to tackle my ongoing spider, moth, fly, and ant problem. I would never be so desperate that I would consider such a thing!

So what have you not done recently?

Ham & Cheese Quiche

2009-10-14T23:57:00.000-07:00

I am not a big fan of eggs. Just not my thing. But I am a fan of quiche. Well, at least the quiche that I make.

Mother's Day 6 or 7 years ago I had brunch with my mom (grandfather and brother) at a small town cafe, I don't remember if I ordered the quiche or someone else did, but none the less, i tried it. loved it. had to have the recipe.

Lucky for me, my grandfather was a regular at the little restaurant at the time and managed to talk to owner out of the recipe for me. She was even so kind as to note the *key ingredient.*

So now I can make it. eat it. and love it.

The only person who loves it more than me: my mom.

So now I am sharing the recipe with you. In hopes that you will make it. eat it. and love it.

Just like me!

The Ingredients:

pie crust, ham, onion, eggs, milk, swiss cheese, flour, and instant chicken bouillon

{i use Marie Callendar's "recipe" for my pie crust *grin*}

chop onion - dice ham - shred cheese

add all ingredients into a bowl

whisk ingredients to combine

place pie crust on a cookie sheet and fill with egg mixture
-placing the quiche on baking sheet makes it easier to get in and out of the oven-
{isn't my cookie sheet a beauty?}

bake quiche @ 425 f for 5 minutes
then reduce to 350 f and bake for 30-40 minutes
or until set

ta-da!
slice and serve
{Note to self: find a left handed pie server and buy it!}
{I tell ya, it's rough living in a world that wasn't made for you.}

Enjoy it! I know I do (and will)!

Ham & Cheese Quiche

Yield: 1 pie

2 cups diced (cooked) ham
1 cup shredded Swiss cheese
2 tablespoons flour
1 tablespoon Instant Chicken Bouillon (*key ingredient)
1 cup milk
3 eggs, beaten
¼ cup diced onion
1 9” unbaked, deep dish pie shell

Preheat oven to 425 degrees F.

Combine all the ingredients except for the pie shell, in a large bowl. Mix well and then pour into unbaked pie shell. Bake in preheated oven for 5 minutes. Reduce heat to 350 degrees and continue to bake for 30-40 minutes until eggs are set.

Apple & The Doll

2009-10-13T00:04:00.000-07:00

Yesterday in my Not Me Monday post I mentioned (how I didn't) discover a doll under my mattress pad and how my cat was (not) most likely to blame.
I just came across strong evidence that leads to me to believe she is in fact guilty.
The video below was taken a few days prior to the mattress incident:

{yes i know i am a dork!}

Not Me Monday!

2009-10-12T06:52:00.000-07:00

It's Monday and that means it's time to admit those things be they odd or embarrassing that I might have done this past week!

Two mornings this past week, in an effort to keep warm in my cold house because the pilot on furnace wasn't lit yet, I did not stand in front of the bathroom mirror flat ironing my hair and putting on making with the blow dryer lying on the floor blowing warm air on my feet.

I am not looking forward to the coming rain this week strictly because it means that I don't have to water my garden and trees. I am definitely not avoiding that chore.

After crawling into bed on Tuesday night I did not feel a hard lump in my bed and worry that something was wrong with a spring in my mattress. I did not then stick my hand under the fitted sheet and under the memory foam mattress topper and discover a doll that had been given to me from Mexico. I most definitely did not fail to notice the doll when putting clean sheets on my bed four days prior to my discovery or while sleeping the bed or when I made my bed each morning. I am much more observant than that!
My cat isn't most likely to blame for the doll's whereabouts.
She never plays with non-cat toys and stuffed animals.

5 Question Friday!

2009-10-09T07:34:00.000-07:00

1. What is the one thing that you reach for the most in a day (excluding phones, computer or children's butts for spankings)?

Since I can't say my phone or computer...My cat. She is always right there wanting to me to pet her.

2. What is the farthest you have been from home?

Belfast, Northern Ireland. For a wedding. Beautiful place. Even though they had one of the worst storms in years while I was there, walking around city center.

(I flew into Dublin, Ireland. Beautiful as well.)

3. What kind of cell phone do you have? Love it or hate it?

iPhone. Love it. most days.

4. Coke or Pepsi?

Pepsi

If a restuarant has Coke products, I opt for a Sprite. Pepsi products, a Pepsi. Most of the time I just order water though.

5. If you could go back and change anything about your wedding day, what would it be and why?

I would change the fact that it hasn't happened yet. :)

Dinner with Grandpa: Breast Health

2009-10-08T22:45:00.001-07:00

I went out to dinner with my grandpa tonight.
Everything was going great.
Dinner was good.
The conversation was good.
And then things went from good to awkward (for me!) in a split second.

We were briefly discussing an (elderly, woman) friend of his who recently was diagnosed with breast cancer.
That topic of discussion concluded.
We ate a few more bites of food and then....
next thing I know my grandfather is asking me
when the last time I had a physical exam was.
(ummmm, huh??, gulp)
I just kind of dismissed the question and was like I don't know...mumble mumble.

Then he proceeded to say "I mean a complete physical exam."
Then I REALLY dismissed the question, rather irritatedly.
I really don't know what I said.
I shook my head.
And mumbled something like not too long ago.
He obviously caught onto my discomfort/irritation and dropped it.

I mean seriously who wants to talk to their grandfather about their breast health!?!
Really, I mean it's the gynecologist who checks that out.
In my head I was thinking "actually I had my annual last week, lump free, thanks for asking!"
But there is no way I was going to say that!!

This isn't the first time this subject has come up either.
A couple years ago he gave me some pamphlet that he came across at the
doctors office about breast health.
I didn't say much.

He's a man. He's 77. I don't talk about this type of stuff with anyone in my family.

Really, I know he is just ~~a huge worry wart~~ concerned for me.
And he is perfectly justified (though he really does worry ~~too much~~ a lot)
{My mom is a breast cancer survivor (diagnosed at 37).}
{And my *maternal* grandmother passed away from the disease.}

So I get it. Really I do.

And
In hindsight (gotta love it), I know I could have (and should have) handled it
so much better.
A simple, "Don't worry I keep up on that type of stuff,"
Would have put his mind at ease.
And been vague enough for me.

I need to get better at thinking on my feet.
{Something to work on.}
(If you have tips on how to do that, I am all ears.)

My sweet grandpa.
Loves me so.
Cares about me so.
{And sometimes spoils me so too.}
{He bought me a great new purse tonight.}
{I couldn't decide between two. So I let him choose for me.}

He's cool like that.

Not Me Monday!

2009-10-05T07:51:00.000-07:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

As for me here's what I didn't do:

If you were to stop by my house at any given moment this last week it is not very likely you would have caught me swinging a dish towel or jumping and clapping my hands in the attempt to kill a moth, housefly, spider or fruit fly. My house is not currently inundated with pests!

I most certainly did not swing a dish towel at a fly and end up hitting the dish water in the sink and splashing it in my face ~~once~~ twice and failing to hit said fly.

While driving to the gym I wasn't listening to my ipod and decided that I wanted to increase the volume and then attempt to repeatedly press the button on my steering wheel to turn up the volume only to realize I had my ear buds in. This most definitely did not happen {twice}.

I did not drive to Walmart on Saturday, park my car and proceed to sit in the parking lot for 5 minutes trying to get the gumption to go inside and grocery shop.

I surely didn't fail to obtain the gumption and end up leaving and head home only to then drive past my house after deciding I really need groceries and would pick up a few necessities at a different store.

I did not drive to the second grocery store take one glimpse at the parking lot and promptly swing into the neighboring Starbuck's parking lot in order to turn around and hightail it out of there!

While waiting to make my escape out of the parking lot I did not get caught by sister who was leaving the grocery (she is not braver than I) and get a "what are you doing" look.

That look was not followed by a "what are you doing" phone call from her. I did not inform her that I would live off french bread, from the local mini grocery store/gas station place down the road from my house, for the next few days in order to avoid having to go to the grocery store.

You can surely bet that I didn't then drive to said store and buy a loaf of french bread (along with milk, cream, and a caramel apple covered in sprinkles). Nope not me!

I didn't not return home with my french bread, slice it and then fry it in a ton of butter and top it with tomatoes and basil. I also didn't use the cream to make a calorie laden sauce to go on a angel hair pasta. I never eat ridiculously high calorie meals!

Now it's your turn....please do tell, what have you not done recently!?!

Five Question Friday

2009-10-02T08:33:00.000-07:00

It's Friday once again. Yippe!

1. What is your favorite ABBA song?

Can't say I am a big ABBA fan, don't really know too many of their songs, but Dancing Queen is ok.

2. The thing you love most about fall is...

The smells! The air is cool, crisp, and clean (or so it seems). And fall means food (Thanksgiving) so their are the smells of food! Mmmmmmm food!! :)

3. What store you would love to spend to heart's desire (money is no object)?

Hmmmm, that's tough. Really there isn't one store that I looooove when it comes to clothes, that is why I like my local consignment store so much, many brands at great prices. I guess, if I had to choose I would say Gap, I love the feel of their clothes and I love that they have a Product Red line.

4. What is your favorite snack food?

I really don't eat snack food and I don't have a big sweet tooth. I will usually cook up some vegetables or eat a salad or leftovers if I want a snack. I do sometimes make a big batch of a Fruit Salsa (pineapple, mango, kiwi, cilantro, onion, lime juice) and eat that with plain potato chips.

5. What was your first car?

1986(?) Chevy Celebrity, it was given to me by my dad. They usually have really bad paint jobs, but he got it painted for me...I even got to pick out the paint color, baby blue (not sure what I was thinking)!

Five Question Friday!

2009-09-25T15:23:00.001-07:00

It's Friday Again! That means it's time to answer five fun questions.

1. What celebrity have you been told you look like?

Can't say that I have ever been told I look like a celebrity.

2. What is your all time favorite movie, any special reason why?

Hmmm. Can't say I have a favorite really. I do like Mr. & Mrs Smith quite a bit. Good mix of action, comedy, and love.

3. Since we're talkin' movies...Popcorn: overrated, underrated, or 'bout right?

Regular popcorn: overrated. Last time I was at the movie theater I didn't eat any. May have had something to do with the fact that I would have had to battle four kids for the bucket. :) But really it just isn't my thing (and it often gives me heartburn).

Now, I do love Kettle Corn. I actually went to buy some at the grocery store a couple of weeks ago and then remembered I don't have a microwave. I am now reconsidering the whole no microwave thing. (really it's a counter space issue more than anything)

4. Are you a glass half empty or half full kinda person?

Half empty. ::blush:: Just being honest though. I am a worrier. So I am not always optimistic and positive. I am working on it though.

5. What perfume/cologne do you wear?

No perfume for me. Usually gives me a headache. Just body spray occasionally, Bath & Body Work's Warm Vanilla Sugar is my scent of choice.

Tomato & Basil Bruschetta

2009-09-23T18:24:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite things to eat is bruschetta topped with a mixture of tomatoes, basil, and garlic.

Now, you may be thinking, but Ash, bruschetta is bread topped with tomatoes, basil, and garlic. Well, technically bruschetta, is Italian, for bread that has been toasted or grilled. After turning bread into bruschetta it is then generally topped with something savory.

Call it what you like...I call it delicious! Ok, and sometimes Bruschetta too, even though that's technically not entirely accurate. :)
Ok, so now that we are clear on that now a little background of the recipe: The other day I was going through my goggle reader and I came across a blog post. The writer had just seen the movie Julie & Julia. Well, apparently in the movie (I say apparently because I didn't get around to seeing the movie while it was in my local theater, darn it) Julia Child makes brushetta, but not using the traditional grilling or toasting method. You ready for this....she toasts it, on the stove top, in a pan, of.....BUTTER! (Yes, that means that the bread is basically FRIED IN BUTTER!) I was intrigued. Toasting bread in butter?? That's different. Interesting. Probably pretty good too. I decided to give the method a try and top the result with my own topping recipe.
(Which by the way doesn't have any olive oil in it, so fewer calories, who's looking out for ya??)

The result: AMAZING! Better than I could have ever imagined. Since that fateful day I tried Julia's method, I have gone through two loaves of french bread. (Good thing I have a gym membership once again! I need all the help I can get!) So here it is

How to make Julia's Bruschetta with my Tomato & Basil topping:

The ingredients:
French or Italian Bread, Tomatoes, Basil, Kosher Salt, Garlic, and Butter!

Chop the tomatoes (as many as you like) into bite size pieces and place in a small to medium size bowl :

Next, lay 2-4 cloves of garlic (use as much or as little as you like) on your cutting board. (Please, please use fresh garlic, not the jarred, chopped stuff. There is a big difference!) Lay your knife over top of the garlic and give it a wack with the palm of your hand. This will crack your garlic and loosen the skin. Remove the skin from your garlic and discard:

Chop the garlic into small pieces. Liberally sprinkle chopped garlic with kosher salt. Chop garlic some more:

Lay your knife on top of the chopped garlic. Holding the handle of the knife slide the knife over the garlic while applying pressure, move the knife left to write up and down. The idea is that you are smearing and mashing the garlic into your board to create a paste. You can use the palm of your hand to apply pressure to the blade of the knife it that helps. Occasionally run the blade of your knife through the garlic giving it a chop. This method will keep you (or anyone else) from biting into a large chunk of garlic and will add the needed salt to your tomatoes:

Scoop up the garlic using the edge of your knife and add to the tomatoes:

Chop a hand full (more or less, to taste) of basil, add to tomatoes, and stir:

While tomato mixture sits and the flavors develop melt 2-3 tablespoons of butter in a large skillet over medium high heat (be careful not to brown the butter):

Slice bread and place in the skillet, giving each slice a little swirl to coat well with butter. Toast until golden brown, remove from skillet. (If toasting additional slices of bread repeat previous steps.) :

Once bread is toasted (sorry forgot to get a picture of toasted bread) place on a large platter and top with tomato mixture:

Serve. Enjoy!!

Tomato & Basil Bruschetta

Tomatoes (any type)
Fresh Garlic
Kosher Salt
Basil, handful
Butter
French Bread

Chop as many tomatoes as desired. Chop garlic (as much or as little as you like).
Liberally sprinkle garlic chunks with Kosher Salt. Chop.
Lay your knife on top of the chopped garlic. Holding the handle of the knife slide the knife over the garlic while applying pressure, move the knife left to write up and down.
The idea is that you are creating a garlic paste.
Add garlic paste to tomatoes.
Chop a handful (again as much or as little as you like) of basil.
Add to tomatoes & garlic.
Stir to combine.

In a large skillet over medium high heat melt 2-3 tablespoons of butter.
Slice bread.
Place bread slices into skillet. Swirl around to coat in butter.
Toast bread until golden brown.
Remove to a serving platter.
Add an additional 2-3 more tablespoons of butter to skillet.
Toast additional bread slices until golden.

Arrange bread on serving platter.

Top with tomato, basil, garlic, mixture.

Enjoy!

my grandfather, robbed

2009-09-18T19:14:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you are going about life and out of nowhere something happens. Something that shocks and shakes you. Something that reminds you how grateful you are for those that you have in your life, those that you love.

This recent event did just that for me:

A week ago Thursday, I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize, being the person I am and not liking surprises I didn't answer it. Next thing I know my voicemail beeps, which is great because next to not liking to be surprised by who is on the phone I don't like it when the person doesn't leave a message so then I have no clue who called! I fight with my phone for a few minutes and finally am able to listen to the message. It is J, the owner of the house that my grandfather lives in (my 77 year old grandfather that I often go out to eat with). J is in her 80's and lives a few hours away in a big city and my grandfather lives in her childhood home in the country as a caretaker, occasionally she comes to visit.

As I begin to listen to J's message, my phone begins having issues again and the message keeps pausing, finally it sorts itself out enough for me to realize what she is saying....she was calling to tell me that my grandfather had been the victim of a home invasion about an hour ago. I couldn't believe what I was hearing!

I begin to process what she is saying and continue listening to the message when my grandfather beeps in. As usual he greets me with "hello (insert my first and last name)" and asks me what I am up to, his voice clearly a little rattled and shaky. I tell him I was just listening to a message from J. His response "what about?" I responded with "about what happened to you!" He didn't say too much more but did ask me to come out to his house, to which I agreed to do.

I left my house and began driving, I quickly decided to see if my (step/adopted) sister was home and could go with me. I call her and she agrees to ride along. During the 20 minute drive to my house I begin to process what has happened and prepare myself for what I may see and the eeriness of walking into the house. At this point I have some details and information because I returned J's phone call.

We arrive at my grandfather's house and walk through the yard to the door and this is what we see:

My sister and I joined my grandfather in the kitchen and he begins to tell his story (in between him pouring himself glasses of vodak to calm his nerves!).

Around 2 o'clock in the afternoon he was lying on the couch in the living room taking a nap and was suddenly awoken by a loud bang (the back door being kicked/forced open). Next thing he knows he see's a large man running towards him with a shotgun and a smaller man following behind him. The larger man yells at him to get on the floor face down. My grandfather is obviously very dazed and confused, having just woken up and on top of that not having his glasses on. He does the best he can to get on the floor as he is told however, he has a rather large belly (much like that of a very pregnant woman, just sayin!) The larger of the two men proceed to tie his hands together as well as his feet (for the record it was a square knot and not too bad of one according to my grandpa, gotta love him!). The man then threw a thick blanket over my grandfather's head and repeatedly told him not to look at them. My grandfather informed the a man number of times he men that he couldn't breath. He has emphysema. So it is difficult for him to lay like that and especially have a blanket over his head. At one point the man did toss him his oxygen (cords).

The smaller man proceeded to run from room to room as the large man paced around continually pointing the shotgun at my grandfather and instructing him not to look at them. After what was probably 5-10 minutes my grandfather estimates they left. My grandfather proceeds to untie his hands first followed by his feet and quickly got up and proceeded to see if they found one of his pistols that he keeps in a less than obvious place. They missed that one! So having now armed himself he proceeded to look around to make sure they were gone. Once he determines they are gone he grabs a phone and calls 911. (They had cut the cord to one phone and threw the cordless out into the yard, but there was a phone hidden out of site and my grandpa was able to call for help).

As he waited for the sheriff deputies to show up he was able to survey what was missing. The final count was approx $175, 4 rifles and 2 shotguns that belonged to him and a pistol that belonged to the home owner and between 3-4 boxes of ammunition.

About 20 minutes later a number of sheriff's deputies arrived and proceeded to interview him and search the premises. Of all things in the house they dusted for prints they chose a candy dish! The dish has a lid on it and apparently the lid had previously been on the dish and was now off the dish and my grandfather noticed that and pointed it out.

My grandfather wasn't able to give much of a description as he didn't have his glasses on and was dazed from being awoken so suddenly. He also didn't see a vehicle because of being asleep when they arrived and tied up when they left.

We did find out later that a couple of people working the rice ground around his house did catch a glimpse of a vehicle driving rather fast down his dirt road around the time of the robbery. They were able to provide the color and an idea on the type of vehicle.

So, needless to say my grandfather was a bit shaken up and a little upset! But the story doesn't end there.

The next day rolls around and there is nothing in the local paper or on their website about what happened to my grandfather....that is until a second home is robbed! Yes, the very next day the same men struck again! This time around 11 a.m. and armed with two guns instead of one. The second set of victims was a husband and wife and they too lived in a house that was a little off the road. There story was similar to that of my grandfather's. They were both tied up and robbed of guns and in their case, gold coins. They were able to provide a description of the vehicle (similar color and body type that was seen leaving my grandfather's house) and they described the men similar to how my grandfather did as well, one larger, one smaller, they were able to provide a guess on age and weight as well.

A sheriff's deputy was actually at my grandfather's home interviewing him when he got the call to report to the home of the second robbery victims.

Just crazy!

As of yesterday my grandfather spoke to the detective and they have 6 people that they are looking into/interested in. Two more so then the others (one large, the smaller). So we are hopeful that they will be able to make an arrest soon.

As I think of what my grandfather was feeling and thinking as he laid on the floor I get sick to my stomach.

He has said to me that he wondered if they were going to shoot him once they got what they wanted and were on their way out door.

I try to just focus on how grateful I am that my grandfather's life was spared and he came out of this relatively unharmed (just some bruises, scrapes and obviously pretty shaken up). I am also grateful that the other victims were spared as well.

I know my grandfather (understandably) has some uneasiness and anxiety after what happened. I pray that all three (victims) find comfort and peace and that the men who are responsible for these crimes are brought to justice, soon!

Five Question Friday!

2009-09-18T11:28:00.001-07:00

It's 5 Question Friday! Brought to us by: Mama M!

1. What's your favorite line from a movie?

Couldn't really come up with anything off the top of my head other than

"No wheezing the juice!"

and

"Don't tax my gig so hard core cruster"

Encino Man! Hilarious movie!!

2. What "group" did you belong to in high school? Goths, jocks, preps, drama, nerds?

Honestly...........I was a loner. I just didn't relate well to other high-schoolers. My closest friends were in their 20's (and married with kids!). I seemed to relate to them more in terms of ways of thinking and acting. Plus I enjoyed helping them with their kids and things.

3. If you had $1000 just for yourself what would you spend it on?

My first thought was clothes!! I would love to buy an actual wardrobe. I am never happy with my choices of what to wear because I buy a great shirt here and there, but never have had a complete wardrobe that I am happy with.

Then I thought some more and remembered....oh yes, I have been wanting a Canon Rebel....that would be a nice way to spend that money!!

So now I am conflicted and am having a hard time deciding, not that I actually have that decision to make or anything, but it's bugging me none the less.

4. What was your favorite childhood cartoon?

Loved Inspector Gadget! Also Carebears! And Tale Spin!

5. What kind of sleeper are you? Back? Tummy? Side? Sprawler?

I am usually a side sleeper, but sometimes a back sleeper and occasionally a tummy sleeper. But I always still manage to sprawl a little no matter what position I am in.

Five Question Friday!

2009-09-04T09:30:00.000-07:00

1. The clothing outfit you remember from childhood and why?

This question is driving me nuts! I know there had to of been an outfit....I am sure there was. I just can't think of it off hand. I wore a lot of knee length leggings with lace at the bottom and colorful shirts. Lots of neons. It was the late 80's early 90's after all. Wishing I had my childhood photo album to refresh my memory!

2. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

A teacher. I used to read to my stuffed animals holding the book open and facing them with one hand (my mom was always impressed that I could do this at the age of 4).

I still consider going back to school to become a teacher.

As I got older I decided I would love to just be a mom.

3. What is your must have for Fall?

My must have for fall (and especially winter) is my white hat (though it has seen better days). I haven't found another hat that fits just like it. I love to wear it when it is raining to tame my frizzy hair or when it's windy or when I am to lazy to do anything with my hair. It is also warm as well as convenient (not that it's terribly cold here in the fall).

4. If money were no object, how many kiddos would you really have?

That would be a dream come true!! I want to adopt and adoption is far from cheap. I would just keep going (adopting and having kids) until it felt right or my sanity started to go.

5. The best part of your birthing story (other than the beautiful child at the end).

I haven't birthed any babies.

So my favorite would be my own birth. My dad and 4 yr old brother sang (I believe a Michael Jackson song) all the way to the hospital while my mom was in labor. I don't think she was too thrilled with them.

Also watching my sister have her second baby (I was 17 at the time). And the C-section of her fourth (2 yrs ago). It was amazing to welcome a little life into the world (two different ways).

And didn't scare me off from having kids in the least. (Though I definitely don't want to have a c-section, ever!)

5 Question Friday!

2009-08-21T10:01:00.000-07:00

1. What is your biggest Pet Peeve?

Definitely a cluttery/messy house!

2. With no worries about finances, childcare, or travel time...where would you most want to vacation?

There seems to be so many places that I hear about and think....ooohhh I want to go there!! But then I can never remember their names or where they are located. Right now I am thinking somewhere warm, soft sand and with beautiful water, maybe Hawaii.

3. If your house was in the path of a tornado and you had time to grab 3 things before the house was totally destroyed (children, husband, pets are already out) what 3 items would you grab?

First off I am going to assume a few things:
1. i am fleeing the tornado in my car
2.my purse is in my car (it often is)
3. my camera is in my car (it too often is)
4. I am fully dressed and make up is applied (I have nightmares about a disaster happening and not being properly dressed or having make up on. This might have something to do with the fact that when my mom was a senior in high school her house caught on fire (and ended up burning down). My grandmother was stepping out of the shower and smelled smoke, she grabbed clothes and my moms jewelry box and ran out of the house!)

Ok, now that, that's settled, on to my list:

1. Computer is a must It contains way to many important things
2. My iphone
3. A snack (I live to eat and I can't think of anything else!)

4. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?
I have yet to discover the perfect place I would love to live.

Somedays I want to live in an old (remodeled) home on a good size piece of land (in the country), where I can have fruit trees, a huge garden, animals, children running around etc. I want that place to have nice weather, great farmers markets/shops, a Whole Foods, Barnes & Noble, and Target nearby.

Then there are days where I think how much I would love to move to a third world country where I can help others improve their lives. Sometimes the thought of just living simply, having only the necessities, and helping others sounds so nice.

5. What is your ~~family's~~ favorite homecooked meal?

I rarely ever make a "meal" since I cook just for me. I usually just make a salad or veggies, nothing special, but if I had to pick a full meal it would probably be (because I am craving it): Brown Sugar Meatloaf, Mashed Potatoes, & Buttery Salted Corn or (fresh) Green Beans cooked in butter, salt & pepper.

Fingers, Toes, & Fertility?

2009-08-19T14:07:00.000-07:00

It is no secret to those who know me that I want to adopt. A couple months ago I had a very awkward and somewhat jaw dropping exchange with someone regarding my desire to adopt, it was during a job interview actually.

The job was for a personal assistant position at a small insurance agency. My first interview was with the owner of the insurance agency (We'll call him Mr B) and went very well. The interview, which lasted about an hour, was very casual and relaxed (e.g. we discussed which type of parsley is better when cooking, curly or Italian, for the record we both agree Italian).

One of the questions that Mr. B asked me was where I would like to be in the next 5 years. I responded that I would like to have a successful career (I neglected to mention that my true career of choice would be that of a SAHM) and be building my family through adoption. He thought that was great and the conversation continued on. As the interview came to a close, he requested that I send him a summary of the things we discussed through out the course of the interview, as this sort of thing would be a task as his assistant that I would take on. Mr. B also mentioned that he would like me to possibly come back second interview and to meet the other two people in the office.

After arriving home from the interview I sat down and proceed to type out in outline format the topics and details of the things we discussed, not missing a detail I included the topic of where I would like to be in 5 years. Listing my responses: Successful career, Building my family through adoption. I sent off the page long summary and let him know that I would welcome an opportunity to meet with him and the other individuals in his office for a second interview. Mr. B promptly responded with "(EXCELLENT)."

The next evening Mr. B called and asked if I would be willing to come in for a second interview the following afternoon and meet the other individuals in his office, I agree to do so. I arrive promptly for my interview, greet Mr. B and take seat in the conference room, Mr. B poked his head into an office and invites the other insurance agent in the office to join in on the interview, well call him Mr. C. Just as Mr. B. sits down the phone rings and he steps right outside the door to take the call. Mr. C comes into the conference room says hi to me and sits down and picks up my resume and a copy of the notes that I sent Mr. B. and looks over them. After a little small talk and few minutes of very awkward silence Mr. C. says to me, "Can I ask you a question?". To which I respond "sure." Now let me just say that at this point I was already pretty uncomfortable. Mr. C is one of those people who stares you straight in they eyes, not looks, stares. He holds that stare for a long time while saying nothing, until you find you must look away because it is so awkward. So Mr. C proceeds to ask "So what's up with this whole adoption thing?" a little surprised by his questions I respond "I just want to adopt, that is how I would like to build my family, it is something that is hard to explain, I am just drawn to it." He is quite for a minute and then responds with: "I was just wondering, I mean from what I can tell you have ten fingers and ten toes, so you seem perfectly fine. (meaning healthy) to me" It was all I could do to keep my jaw from hitting the floor. I could not believe what I had just heard. I wanted so badly to say "excuse me, you are gauging my health and ability to reproduce based on looking at me??" Not to mention what a ridiculously inappropriate thing to say to someone you just met and during a job interview none the less! Oh, how I wish Mr. B had been there.

I ended up having to go to lunch with Mr. B and the creep Mr. C. That was a load of fun as you could imagine. It involved more uncomfortable staring on Mr. C.'s part and a little embarrassment on my part as I fumbled my spoon and splashed red curry sauce all over my hand.

I found out a few days later that Mr. B opted to go with someone who had prior insurance experience. On one hand I really wanted a job and liked Mr. B but on the other hand I was relieved because I did not want to work with Mr. C.

And in case you are wondering the "C" doesn't stand for creepy. Though it very well could!

Dinner with Grandpa: Things that make you go hmmmm

2009-08-04T21:21:00.000-07:00

My grandfather and I go out to eat fairly regularly. Often once or twice a week. It usually entails lots of talking (on his part mostly) and too much food. The invitation for dinner usually begins with grandpa calling to extend the invitation around around four o'clock. However, if I am unavailable, my phone will continue to ring every 5-10 minutes until I answer. Grandpa doesn't leave messages. When grandpa does leave messages it is usually something urgent or at least something HE considers urgent.

So this afternoon grandpa begins his calling. I speak to him a little after five once I was able to get my phone working (word of advice: never ever unplug an i-phone during an update, that is unless you want to render it useless). I told him I would pick him up in 30. Once I pick him up we go through the usual debate of where to dine. I was given three options and told to pick. I chose a local Italian restaurant. It's family night and they offer a small buffet. Perfect for indecisive me. It was dinner as usual. Grandpa talked the poor waitresses ear off (gotta love him though!). And we both ate too much. Just as we are finishing our meal a man was seated at table next to ours. I think to myself..."oh poor older gentleman is eating alone"....and then minutes later what to my amazement do I see waltzes up to his table? This:

Except more tanned and with short dark hair and the dress was a tad shorter. (if you can imagine that!) Everything else was pretty much spot on. the same as the pic. Seriously. She had to be no older than 25. Seriously he had to be about 60. She plops down in the empty seat at the man's table and instantly starts telling him how she just chewed out one of her good friends and how fortunately that only happens every four months or so....okkkayyy. And then it happens. Old man stands up comes up to her, swoops his head down and says "hi" in a low hey baby type of voice and kisses her, with an open mout.....ewwww. So weird! Seriously. My poor grandpa was talking and I wasn't listening. I was so, so...shocked, baffled and honestly intrigued.

Let me just say even the wait staff were shocked! The kept giving each other "looks." Especially the owner's two sons who work there....14 and 15 years old. Seriously I don't know how the one teenager delivered the balsamic and oil to their table and kept a straight face or his eyes from bugging out of his head.

I just can't help but wonder what their "story" is.

Actually, I am pretty sure I really don't want to know.